You Didn't Ask For This
You Didn't Ask For This
111 | Thou Shalt Read the Room
We've got a very special etiquette-themed episode for you this week! We've been saving up some questions of etiquette in various situations and now you get them all at once, including: What's the proper etiquette for asking someone to be the base in pool chicken? For inviting a friend of yours to a party they weren't invited to? For guillotine use? Then, Eric brings Matt a fresh Pop Quiz: Punk or Poser
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Eric, I talked about this recently on a recent episode that we've been working on the front room. Yes, with the bookshelves.
Eric:With the bookshelves, the bookcases, the bookcases, yes, the bookcases.
Matt:Getting it furnished, getting it into an actual room, because since we've moved into this house for like a year, it's been like basically a dumping ground of like boxes that got to go out, as is tradition, sure. So now we're making it um, proper and someplace that right, proper, rock, proper, and makes it look like someone lives in this house when you walk through the door. And so we were furniture shopping recently. Okay, and you know we did. We did a lot of the stores that you would expect. Of course, our friends, I Friends, ikea, home goods Gave that a spin, gave home goods a spin, stuff like that Got to. But we also went to furniture stores and, eric, there is very few things, there are very few things in this world that I hate more than being stalked at a furniture store.
Eric:Oh, by the work, by the work, by, like the salesman, by the salesman.
Matt:Sales person and listen, I know for the salespeople out there, I know you've got a job to do.
Eric:Okay, I know you're on that grind.
Matt:It's what the company is making. It's what Lazy Boy is making. You do, I understand it?
Eric:But listen my Haverty's friends, just chill the fuck out, just back off my shit, just back off my shit, my thermometer of stress just goes straight through the roof.
Matt:The second I walk through a furniture store Because you know how they're all like lined up, like there's an order, like the next, the next one of them gets the next person to walk through the door like lord of the flies shit with sales yeah, they like swarm in on you and if you get a good one, they'll be like all right, well, I'll be around if you have any questions.
Matt:I'll be right over there if you need any. Yeah, if you get a good one, they'll be like all right, well, I'll be around if you have any questions.
Eric:I'll be right over there if you need anything. And then they fuck off.
Matt:They fuck off and maybe they come check on you after like 20 minutes. That's acceptable to me, yep, but what I hate, eric what I cannot stand, pour the tea baby, I'm here, eric.
Matt:What I cannot stand Pour the tea baby, I'm here Is when you're like looking around and you look over your shoulder and 30 feet away, but like milling about an Ottoman, is the fucking guy who's just like waiting for you to take more than five seconds looking at a piece of furniture. So what do you think about this one? Yeah, is this catching your eye For him to sweep in and just be like it actually has a hidden storage compartment underneath.
Eric:And I'm like listen fuck off my guy.
Matt:Let me look at these tables by in peace.
Eric:You are actively chipping away at the precious crystal sphere containing all of my fucks to give all and like, like you're, you're just chip, you're just chipping and, and then what?
Eric:and like, at a certain point I realized that on the easily cowed um, that this tactic might work. You might pressure them into a sale, but with me, my adhd ass brain. At a certain point you have put too much on me and i'm'm just like bail, ripcord, bye. There's a million different places I can go to buy furniture. Goodbye, do not speak to me, do not perceive me.
Matt:A hundred percent and Lindsay and I. Lindsay always has to give me. Well, she doesn't have to, she chooses to give me a little pep talk Like as we're pulling up to a place. She's like matt, there's gonna be a guy and I'm like I know there's gonna be a guy.
Eric:I was like I don't need.
Matt:I don't need this kind of talk, uh, and she and she'll be like don't take that town with me. And she'll be like I'm just saying we can't go in there and I don't want you getting upset. The second somebody talks to me and I was like, fine, as long as they don't fucking talk to me, they're gonna talk to you, to you. You know, this is what happens. So we walked through the door and the person never becomes over to me like a vulture, to a carcass, and I say something like yeah, we're good, oh, we're good, oh, thanks so much, I'll seek you out. But then we walked down the aisle, eric, and I just look over my fucking shoulder and Lindsay's already like yep, he's going to be there, he's going to be there and I look over.
Eric:He's going to be watching you.
Matt:And I see him and I'm like baby, he's fucking watching us. And she was like I know that, I told you that and I was like yeah, but he's doing it.
Eric:He's looking at the thing that I want to put my ass on every day. Yeah, and so I'm looking at me look for for ass things he's looking me for ass things and I I don't want that.
Matt:I don't want that. That's why that's why I stoop so low as to show up to that loading dock store to see zane and justice for zane and almost get myself killed.
Eric:Yeah, oh man yeah, but again, nice guy zane didn't love zane in many ways the nicest fucking psychopath um, but yeah it's, it's a, it's like an indescribable vulnerability when you're, when you're like shopping for furniture, and I just need to be left with my thoughts, yes, and my gut, and and when they start, they start chirping, they start chirping and pitching because I and it and it and it fucks with my calculus because I sit in a chair and I'm immediately like okay, let me try to close my eyes.
Matt:Let me picture myself I'm reading a book blah, and you know, this one also comes in leather and I'm like hey, my guy, fuck your children.
Eric:May your line be reduced to dust.
Matt:Hey, my guy, I don't want to be dramatic, but I hope your tree shrivels up.
Eric:Yep, yep, I hope thy milk curdles and the beer goes stale.
Matt:Let me ask you something Do you want your kids to have a father, in which case back off my dick? Yeah, and Lindsay's like no. I don't think you needed to say that.
Eric:I don't think you needed to wish ruin on his house, Matthew.
Matt:I just want to get this over with in one conversation. Yeah, when I have a question for you, I will approach you, jasper.
Eric:Jasper, you villain, you fucking rogue.
Matt:I will approach you and then demand your immediate attention.
Eric:Yes, and then I will complain when you are not immediately available to me. Now hold my tape measure can you believe this?
Matt:does he want to make a sale or? Not talk about fucking service, jesus, let me tell you something about floor commissions, though, real quick, my very first job. I worked at office max and I was a cashier, but um, I was really good at selling those plans you know, like insurance plans for the chairs and whatever all that bullshit, but the reason I was so good at it was it was problem.
Matt:Well, I should say the fact that I was so good at it was very problematic for the floor workers who earn like commission off of like selling those things and all the I don't earn commission I I'm just sniping.
Matt:I'm just, I'm literally sniping deals. Oh, you're scab, but like I'm just, I also am told to make the pitch if they haven't purchased it. So like they come up and my theory was always the floor. People wore them the fuck down to the point where I'm like oh and were you interested in a five-year coverage plan?
Matt:yeah fine, put it in that yield and like like I gotta be honest, that was the pitch. Like I was just literally like yeah, you, you want this. Like hey, hey, uh, you, you fuck with this and the floor, fuck it, the floor. Workers hated me because I was my numbers were so high and I did not get commission for them. You got this would come back. I've mentioned this, I think, before at barnes and noble. I was very good at um selling the, the memberships uh yes and for one.
Matt:One easy tactic is if people got a lot of shit, it actually will cover the cost of the card. Ah, so like it'll cover the card and it'll give you a discount if you're if you're already spending like 150 or something yeah, dollars or whatever, my point being, you wouldn't even notice it if I just scanned it, right?
Eric:ah, and so like uh, you could be.
Matt:Like hey, I just gave you a discount because I like you so much and this card eric, I could be like that and I was, oh you bad man, and sometimes around the holidays.
Eric:When people are at their most vulnerable.
Matt:When we're getting to the end of the year, right yeah, and hearts are bleeding. Hearts are bleeding and numbers are due for corporations Every now and then. That tactic wouldn't work. And the the person be like just fucking ring me up please, and I'm like, okay, but you literally will save money if you get like I. I'm telling you it'll be like $20. You're like I don't want it. I come here once a year, blah, blah, blah. I'm like totally understand, sir, got it totally. Drop it in the bag. Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me I'm wrong. For that I get a membership, my boss is happy with me and I saved you fucking money bruce, is there any?
Eric:do they have to spend? Do they have to pay any sort of upkeep on this card?
Matt:no, oh yeah, fuck them, you're welcome I mean it automatically renew if you don't tell it not to.
Eric:But you know, that's besides the point, that's besides the point that's.
Matt:Besides the point that's besides the point, I give him the card. Eric, give him the card. My numbers were great. Look at these numbers. Look at my fucking numbers. Fucking Barnes, I haven't worked there in a long time and yet I still feel passionate about it, anyway, anyway, let's start the goddamn show. Yeah, let's start the goddamn show. Well, hello everybody and welcome to you. Didn't Ask For this. It's the podcast answering life's least pressing questions, and my name is Matthew Shea and my name is, for the record, eric Poach.
Matt:Eric Poach let me ask you this yeah, how are you?
Eric:doing? Oh, you know they're taking the house Credit. Plummeted Bank accounts are. You know they're seizing. Everything turns out I had a barnes and noble card that I hadn't made payments on in 15 years yeah, yeah, that's what really gets you that's what really gets you.
Matt:But you know other than that, honestly, vibing tell you what it also got you two days shipping and 40 off god damn cover releases there it is there.
Matt:It is there, it is there it is. Yeah, I still got it. I remember the thing that always got me working at that retail store is like when you'd answer the phone. There's always an ever-changing seasonal greeting that you'd had to do, and one that sticks with me more than the others. It was in like May, right going on into June, and the answer the thing I'd say was thank you for calling Barnes Noble the the number one spot for dads and grads. My name is. Matt how can I help you?
Eric:And now that is the demographic we seek Dad, the number one spot for dads and grads.
Matt:How can I help you? I got a lot of good stories from my time at BNN Dad jokes grad folks Absolutely. Now listen, we've got a little bit of a themed episode on tap. I love a themed episode. Themed episode on tech I love a themed episode. We, Eric, I think one area of question, one subsection of question that we really excel at is etiquette questions.
Eric:Yeah, my God yes.
Matt:And so we have gotten a lot of etiquette questions over time. These have been sitting around for a while, and so we've we've got like four of them here, and so we're just gonna fucking knock them out all in one go all right sit down, but let one, two, three eyes on me.
Eric:Welcome to fucking you daft etiquette school nerds pencils out.
Matt:Okay, phones off no, no, no keep those on, keep those on, keep those, take your pencils.
Eric:Shows on the phone shows on the phone phones out. Take your pencils out so you can put them down.
Matt:We're here to learn, not to educate, that's right, take the pencil out and put them down, fucking listen up all right, respectfully at carissa hatfield asks hi carissa what's the proper etiquette for asking someone to be the base in pool chicken? So this one speaking as a base, eric, go ahead.
Eric:Huh, speaking as a base and that is exactly my point. I was like I am six and a half feet tall, I there is never any situation and I have never gotten to be the top in pool chicken no, and you never will.
Eric:I am a power bottom yeah, in this circumstance, you will always be a bottom a 100 and like yeah, so like the etiquette is, I'm there and someone just gives me like you're ready for this, like they don't even have to add yeah well, I know I am, I have been the top and pull chicken, but, but I'm often, I'm most likely going to be a bottom, especially now.
Matt:Oh, oh, my, yeah, yeah.
Eric:But if it was, you and me, I'm on top of you buddy.
Eric:You gotta be.
Matt:You gotta be. You gotta be underneath me. I'm sitting on your face. That's how you play, right? Yeah, I mean I should be for free, you know, like a safety latch.
Eric:Yeah, yeah, just like I latch on with my teeth, you just bit my dick off what just happened. No, no, no, no, no, I gently gripped it. Nice Between my chompers. Yeah, get a good seal on there, just get a.
Matt:Get a latch on me like a newborn yeah.
Eric:So yeah, but latch on me like a newborn. Uh, so yeah, so, but, but let's assume, let's, let's assume two human beings of equal height and like general like silhouette, both alike in weight and dignity.
Eric:Yes, um, so, so the etiquette is, I mean, like I feel like the proper thing to do is to, is like the, the etiquette. The etiquette thing to do, yeah, is to offer to be the base. Like you are, you are to be the beast of burning. Like, oh, shall I shall? Do you wish to get upon my shoulders? And like, oh, yeah. And then that opens the gate for the other person, like the right of first refusal, that this is the part where they can go. Oh, no, dog, like I am uncoordinated and top heavy, like I can't, I'm just you should be on top of me. But like someone's someone, I feel like the opening offer has to be someone offering me like, all right, all right, do you want to get on my shoulders? Yeah, but when was that Let?
Matt:me ask you this, eric someone offer and be like all right, all right, do you want to get on my shoulders? Yeah, but when was the last? Let me ask you this, eric when was the last time you were in a situation where you played pool chicken? I can't tell you a year I last played.
Matt:it's got to be high school for me, is what I'm saying uh, mine probably probably like a few years post-college yeah, maybe, maybe in college, like a summer party or whatever you know, I had a friend, uh who's who's family home back in lancaster. They had a pool and like I'd still hang out over the summer and you know whatever. But like in my experience and you tell me if this is different from from in the high school, friends hanging out in a pool, situation which I feel is the normal place where pool chicken lives yes, the most likely place for it to occur.
Eric:The hormones are raging. Boys wanna, boys wanna be.
Matt:That's exactly my point like I can't remember the last time I a played pool chicken but b didn't have the sub-objective of having a woman on top of me as the top chicken.
Eric:Yeah, I mean like that pole chicken is the like we can say the quiet part out loud it is, it is the universal excuse to have someone's legs wrapped around your head. Yes, the wrong way, but nevertheless to wear the finest pair of earmuffs that a pool can buy.
Matt:To wear the finest pair of earmuffs that a pool can buy To wear the finest pair of earmuffs, which are human thighs.
Eric:Yes.
Eric:Yes, which is a privilege it's a privilege. It's on, it rules.
Matt:And I'm not even trying to say anything I think out of pocket. I'm just saying I think that's why pool chicken was made.
Eric:Yeah, yeah, oh, hello, think out of pocket. I'm just saying I think that's why pool chicken was made. Uh, yeah, yeah, oh, hello, hello, barely dressed person covered in water. Do you wish to play a game that essentially involves you doing the black widow neck twist maneuver on me, but without killing me, so you? Can knock and and it yeah. So so us two dumb asses on bottom, we just look up exactly.
Matt:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the objective of pool checking, because I think you tell me if I'm I'm speaking out of my ass here. If you want to play a pool game, I mean you want to play the game, say it. You're playing marco polo, oh okay what are you playing close?
Eric:uh, uh, very sharks and minnows baby, oh, sharks of course, sharks and minnows sharks, of course, sharks and minnows. Oh, I'm mad of culture I see, so fun. I didn't know I was talking to an aristocrat, oh yeah, philosopher, king of old, um uh, sharks and minnows rules. Also funny story because the people who listen to the show know exactly what story I'm about to tell.
Eric:I did infamously, uh, give my friends one of my best friends, his now wife, girlfriend at the time a black eye playing sharks and minnows, because I was the shark and I was blind and I was swinging these big noodley limbs about just like and I smicker, smack, right, right and I gave her a black eye and it gets brought up I'd say every two to three years. Got to, got it like. I will never live it down no, and nor should you eric and alicia, if you're listening to this, truly you gotta fucking duck like I'm a shark, you're a minnow, you've gotta.
Eric:Fucking keep your head on a swivel, like I don't. I always like give it a valuable lesson that day, which is like when you're when you're a minnow in the water with sharks, you gotta. And and fucking frankenstein swinging my arms around, you gotta got to dodge.
Matt:What he's trying to say is you're welcome, but I always preferred maybe Marco Polo, because I and again, how many years has it been since I played any kind of pool game? But in my youth I was quite good at swimming underwater. So, I was quite adept at being able to pop up. Oh, it's a bottom feeder. Give that polo and silently just under the water and zoom it a notable distance.
Matt:Pop up again polo back under the water like I, just I'm. I am truly like a, a mist. A mist upon the, upon the waves.
Eric:Where am I? You don't know. You don't know where I am. I would do that thing where, like I would sink down, I would like get my like right before I'm ready to go down, like just my mouth, just like right by the yeah.
Matt:So I don't want to hear him, I don't want, I don't want them to hear the splash of me submerging, sometimes urging sometimes, yeah, you, that's what I'm saying you just get your little face up and go pull up and back and then slip under. Yeah, you sink down in the water like a fucking psycho. Yeah, you slip on in and out of that water like you're martin sheena in apocalypse now, or you, you know, you're just, you're just popping in and out. Yes, you just do that. And then, if you, if you really want to flaunt how good you are one time when you're going close to Marco, just let your toes, just stroke that leg, just briefly on the way by.
Eric:Oh my God, Just let them know. Dunking on him, oh, absolutely.
Matt:Just let them know, fuck you, I'm right here. You don't know and you never will, never will, you will never discover the riches of this East.
Eric:So, in short, that's what marco paulo so, in short, uh, proper etiquette for playing pool chicken. Oh right, there's a question. Yeah, always offer offer to be the base first. Yeah, um, give them right, a first refusal, and uh, you know and like no, just know yourself.
Matt:Like, take a good hard look at yourself. Imagine what if you're, if you're talking as an adult to adult, imagine the back pain you may or may not cause a person. If you are the upper crust, yeah. If you're gonna be the the heavier of the two people, yeah, you know, be the bottom and own it. Be the bottom, be the bottom and own it, because you are past the point. You're past this high school flirtation. You're past this, like this neat because, eric, if I were to, once you're in your 30s.
Eric:It's about the game. It's about the game. You got to get your head out of the fucking thighs and into the game.
Matt:Listen, you had your fun with the thigh earmuffs in 12th grade.
Eric:Now it's time to get serious Now it's time to fucking murder that other person on their shoulders.
Matt:There's a fucking role for you down there, okay, yeah, you know what it is, eric, because you keep bringing this up as if it is universally true of Major League Baseball. This is not Little League, where right field goes to the person who can't run and can't catch. Yeah, this, if you're playing pool chicken as a base as an adult, if you're playing right field as adult, no, no, you got responsibilities, you got to know the position you got to get in there.
Matt:You got to play. Okay, you're no longer contending with brendan, the coach's son. Okay, you are a professional base fucking bless power bottom, that chicken power bottom.
Eric:Speaking of being a professional base, good etiquette as well, just also good physics. Um, your, your inclination you dirty pervert is going to be reach like when they're sitting on your shoulders is to reach up and clamp your hands around their thigh. High school move, high school move. That's fucking no. You reach around their shins, you lock your arms in front of yourself, like you just hold your arm and like that will secure them and you provide an exquisite base, an exquisite base Because, listen, if I'm a married man, I'm going to end up playing pool chicken with any female other than my wife.
Matt:I'm going to pull that person close, give them pep talk and be like look, I know who you think this is, but I'm here to play. Okay, my eyes are up here, I'm going to be pulling those legs in close and you, your back, listen, your back may go back, may fall off.
Eric:These legs ain't going up.
Matt:So I hope you were doing core, because you're going to have to pull yourself up, girl, so moving on, yeah, next question.
Eric:This comes from at Sarah Feldman.
Eric:Hi Sarah.
Eric:What's the proper etiquette for inviting a friend of yours to a party they weren't invited to?
Matt:This is a great question and I think I can answer it real quick, you don't?
Eric:Or just play the devil's advocate. Or yeah, let's Because there are situations like, let's say, you know I'm invited to a party, turns out friends crashing at my place this weekend. I do, I do. I just tell that friend, hey, I'm just gonna need you to like sit and chill like in the living room of my house and go like just kind of sit there for like five or six hours while I'm out getting six hours, you're 35 eric not not up here, or you're gonna be 35 not up here, not up there, but in the rest of the bones, oh yeah no, I feel it.
Eric:I sacrifice these bones when I party you can, you can.
Matt:Honestly, let's push the bits out of the yeah, yeah, bits, bits side this is a free space yeah you're telling me you can do five hours of a party oh bro, I'm, I'm, I, yeah, I'm.
Eric:I'm regularly the person like now. Granted, partying for me now isn't just fucking like chugging alcohol and shit. Partying for me is going, just hanging out, listening to cool music and fucking chilling with my homies while we may or may not partake of.
Eric:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah okay, yeah, in that case totally, but yeah, but like I can go to, like I could go to like two or three in the morning, yeah, so inviting a friend. So this is this is my approach, this is my recommendation. Uh, first of all, you don't mention the party's existence to the friend until you have reached out to the person hosting the party and given them a solid hey, just getting a temperature check. I've got the like is it okay if my friend joins me? Now, if you and the host are tight, 99 times out of 100, they'll be like oh yeah, no, no problem. But if this is like, let's say, a coworker is hosting a party, like someone you're you're not like really friends with, but your acquaintances with, and they've invited you to a party and like a bunch of your coworkers and shit are going to be there, at that point it's just hey, or plus one's okay, exactly that's that's it.
Eric:That's the beginning of the end. And they're like hey, your plus one's okay. Do you have a space? No worries, and I always throw in like a no worries if not just want to check.
Matt:Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the reason I was so quick to be like you don't the asterisk there is you? Don't without checking, Because if you show up to I think showing up to a party with someone who wasn't invited and you didn't give the host any kind of heads up, not even a courtesy, like hey, I'm gonna be bringing my boy, yeah, like just so you know, like I, I like I got no choice, really like there's your example, they're staying with me or whatever.
Matt:Yeah, you got to you gotta bring them, but got to give the person a little bit of a hey, just so you know, is it cool if I bring my tall friend Eric Because, like yeah, Because, like you've got a pool, we might be playing pool, chicken we might be playing pool chicken and like I don't want to be in a circumstance where we don't have enough power bottoms.
Eric:It's the worst problem to have at those kinds of parties really is.
Matt:Yeah, so many hours, marco polo. Then yeah, um, so you put, you gotta pull, you gotta pull in the, the party host for the.
Eric:Okay, that's what I'm saying. You just gotta clue them in.
Matt:You just gotta clue them in because, because, maybe they have a tight, maybe they got this thing catered and they got numbers, you know. So like yeah, don't just don't be a party crasher that way.
Eric:That's what I say no, the worst, the worst possible way you can violate this ancient, this social contract. Uh, speaking now I'm going to pivot to a slightly different kind of party, but I've been in situations where I am hosting, I am dming for a game of dungeons and or dragons and something like I have my, like we're, we're showing, like my, it's like our. This happened. It was like our first time, like, hey, we're, everyone's got the character. It's gonna be our first time playing. I'm excited to run the session. I have five players and one of them brought their little brother. Little brother who did not have a character, who had never played dnd and was like hey, yeah, I figured it would be okay if you, you know you could play with us.
Eric:Oh you figured, huh, oh you figured. I have weaved an entire fucking universe.
Eric:I've created life on this board balanced the scales of good and evil around, there being five of you, and you introduce a sixth, a sixth and at that, a child. And a child, um yeah, old enough to play, but like how fucking dare you if you were listening to the show and you play dnd? Never do this. It is the worst thing you can possibly do and I will judge you until the end of time for it I just think it's rude to, in any kind of party, to show up with someone that the person doesn't know.
Matt:Now I will say, if the party is of a certain size, yes, yes then then there, I think, is a relaxed etiquette.
Eric:Yeah, you know if we're hosts, if the party's at a fucking bar and it's like one of those parties where, like, the bar is open and it's just normal bar night. But also we're hosting, if the party's at a fucking bar and it's like one of those parties where, like, the bar is open and it's just normal bar night, but also we're having a party, we rented the back room or whatever that nobody gives a fuck.
Matt:Nobody, I don't think anybody gives a fuck, especially and of course this is accepting also if the invitations like plus ones.
Eric:Yeah, you know, plus one's welcome, bring a friend, whatever.
Matt:Then you don't need to ask, yeah okay, because the host opened it up, yes, but but if there's not that verbiage, I think you have to assume that you need to ask permission. That's my, that's my stance on it.
Eric:And if it's in someone's home.
Matt:Oh god, especially then yes, if it's in a home and you did not ask the host if you could bring a friend, fuck you.
Eric:Yeah, you have officially put that person in the shittiest position to ever be in.
Matt:Yeah, because if I'm hosting something and I invited people to my home and you brought somebody in that I didn't explicitly invite, how do I know I haven't just opened myself up to a vampire situation?
Eric:Yes, Matt will be making many. Matt will be needing Lindsay's help with many a thing in another room and it will be where they discuss what a piece of shit you are.
Matt:Yes, I'm going to pull Lindsay into the room and be like, well, we got to get rid of this guy. Okay, I don't trust him. I don't like the cut of his jib.
Eric:I don't like this one bit. Yeah, why is he showing up?
Matt:shirtless. Yeah what. We have a quality party going on here and the vibe is now off.
Eric:The vibe is now off. It does throw the whole fucking vibe off.
Matt:The whole fucking vibe is off. Yeah, so if you don't want to throw the vibe off, just ask, just ask, just ask. What do you think Eric Did character? Did we hit it? Oh, we nailed it. Now, this one we get. We're getting a little bit more. I'm gonna skip this one.
Eric:I feel like actually this is a good last.
Matt:That's a good closer. So I'm gonna go to a name popped up in the last couple episodes in a row. I feel like at mike perry jr on instagram. Thank you, mike. He asks what's the proper etiquette for showing someone a youtube video you love.
Eric:Oh my God, now we're digging where there's taters.
Matt:Indeed, we are, because there this Eric is tricky, this is tricky and there is a fucking art to it Because, listen and this is going out to anyone who I've ever and this includes you, eric this is going out to anyone who I've ever and this includes you, eric If I texted you a video or in person have been like, hey, I want to show you this video. That is something I am, you've been chosen, bearing my soul to you. I am saying this is required viewing.
Eric:Yes, and.
Matt:I would like your full fucking attention on this video.
Eric:I didn't just stumble upon this and thought, oh, maybe I'm watching this to someone. No, I have weighed the calculus of our entire relationship to each other and the species of humanity before I have shown like you must watch this you must watch.
Matt:this must I make it fucking count I chose this for you because I suspect you'll have an interest in it. Yes, and if you ignore that, don't expect it.
Eric:Don't expect me at your wedding and and you did don't expect me to fucking help you off the ground when you're bleeding in a ditch yeah, yeah um, I'll lean down and be like.
Eric:Remember the trailer tropic thunder 2008 you didn't want to watch it, you little fuck, and this is why I am leaving you gut shot in the desert to die. But there are two different. There's two different levels here. There's two different. There's two different flavors of sharing a video with someone, and you named them. One is I am sending you one online, yes, and we are. We are occupying the same physical space and I'm like all right, you got to check this out. There are two very I have very, very different opinions on execution here. On the etiquette.
Eric:Now I this is me my strong feelings are going to lean much more towards the when we're in person because, matt I don't know if you know this I could be better about responding to messages that people send me online.
Matt:Yeah, you're the way I'd put it, and I, I want to be respectful.
Eric:Oh, yeah, respectfully.
Matt:Um, you're the worst texter I've ever encountered. Yes, this is objectively true, it is um Eric bit free. It can be infuriating. I'm just going to know bit free valid I. I'm just gonna let you know there are times where I'm like what? The fuck yeah, yeah, yeah, I I so, yeah, I'd say there's room for improvement, there's room for improvement but, that being said, if you are, if you are sending someone a video.
Eric:So so etiquette, rule number one for sending video online a do not just drop a link, zero fucking context or exploit. Don't. Don't just drop like a fucking. I'm like what, what? Because a I don't know. If you got fucking fucking hacked and you're sending me random shit, you got to give me like a. At least give me like a, please, at your earliest convenience. Watch this video.
Eric:You will love it sound yeah, yeah, there, like generally when you've got to put you got to give me some, because otherwise what you've done is you've clicked two buttons and are now expecting me to take five minutes of my life and do all that emotional labor to watch the thing.
Matt:If you're yeah you got, I agree. And you, when you're sending me something that you want a bit of content you want me to consume, you generally will either include some witty text or you'll do a voice memo, send the voice memo first. This is your own personal style anyway, to be like I'm about to send you something and then I know, okay, maybe you know I'm out and about, I'm in grocery store, whatever. Okay, I know I got a funny video to watch when I get home. It's in the queue. If you just send me a link, I'm like I don't. And I think there are subsections to this etiquette question as well because, like, it also depends on where the video is right. If we're talking tiktok, if I send you a tiktok or a reel or whatever on the platform, if, if I Instagram message it to you, I message you on TikTok, whatever, that's a. Hey, I thought this would be funny.
Eric:Hey, I saw this the other day.
Matt:I took half a second to send it to you because, like, oh, poachers will think it's funny If I, on those two platforms in particular, anyway, if I text you a TikTok, that is. I don't think there is an additional text needed. That should speak for itself. I want you to watch this.
Eric:Yes, I need you to watch this. I need you to watch this. Please validate my choices. Yeah, 100%. I will also say this Tell me While we're still in the realm of sending it online, and then we can probably move on from there. When I think sending someone a clip or a video or anything, I hear the unimpeachably competent voice of Robin Quick in my head. He's our theater history professor and, uh, chair of the theater department at taliesin university was for was yes, uh. I hear the words why this play at this time for this audience? There is a time and a place for each video, and quantity is not a quality. What's the number one way to ensure that I don't watch anything you send me is if you're one of those folks who sends me like too much 30, goddamn like too much long video.
Eric:Like I'm not, you've just given me an hour long chore. Pick your battles. You got chore. Pick your battles. You gotta pick your battle. You have to a surgical like hey, one of these, oh, oh, my god, the only person.
Matt:But the only person that's applicable to is your significant other, that's the only person who should be watching 20 minutes of tiktok yes, because that's a communal experience then yes, you've gotta, you've got.
Eric:Now, if they watch it, they're like oh my god, that was so funny. And they're like well, if you like that, here's a few more you can check out. When, like, I'll throw like a here's some more you'll like. But like, that's like a, you don't need to watch this right now. You just like come to those if you ever ever come to. Or like oh, if you like that content, here's the channel I got it from. Like they, they make really good, funny stuff. Now let's talk about in person.
Matt:Yes, because this is the tricky part.
Eric:I think the in person is the tricky part, because usually if I'm showing someone videos, like YouTube videos and like in person, usually it's going to be in like a social setting. Yeah, definitely, there's like at least three plus people in the equation, myself included. Now, I may have mentioned this before, I have ADHD. I think it's come up. I think it's come up. So there is no greater hell on earth to me than, like, if we all got together like, oh, we're watching a movie, where we're like we're watching a movie, we're watching a show, and throughout that movie and show, someone is trying like, hey, you should watch this video. Yep, and that is hell to me. That is, that is because, like or like, we're sitting there. Why, like, I'm like focused on they and they're like just like, hey, you're watching. I'm like, I'm like, pause the fucking tv, at least, like you who are you watching movies with that?
Matt:this is even entering their brain. Other people with ADHD, Eric. I'll tell you this right now.
Eric:That's the problem with ADHD. It comes in so many infuriating flavors.
Matt:I'll tell you this right now If you are watching something with me, you are not watching something on your phone, and that's one of the things I love about watching shit with you, because if somebody is watching something on their phone and we start the movie, I will pause the movie and be like do you want to take that? Do you need to take that? Oh, it's just a video. Oh yeah, Do you? You want to go do in another fucking room then?
Eric:Matt, especially if it's something that I have seen. They have not, and I'm trying to show it like I'm like fuck, I'm like you. You are twisting a knife in my fucking liver.
Matt:If I yeah, if I am I'm like, hey, come over, I want you to see this movie. You're seeing this movie and you're dicking around on your phone, I'm going to be like, oh okay, you hate me, that's just great, you hate me and I'll fucking turn it off because, like I'm sorry, I don't think Stanley Kubrick intended his film to be watched part time. God, it drives me insane.
Eric:It really drives me insane. It drives missing plot. Critical information watch it.
Matt:You know if you're hey, if you're all coming over to watch a sporting event, or you know some reality show or some shitty. You know comfort show, that's different.
Eric:You know I'm I'm on my phone during there yes, there's entire category of shows that are background shows. Yes, like Great British Bake Off, fucking, I can have that rolling all day or fuck it. Or if it's a show I've watched a million like if I'm just like playing Parks and Rec or the Office, I don't give a fuck, oh, especially if you're rewatching something.
Matt:Yeah, I'm not a big background show person. Yeah, I'm not a big background show person, but like we generally, when we generally are nightly TV viewing structure is me and Lindsay, that is is, if we're not watching a movie or something, we'll watch one or two like of the dramas that we're watching right now, then like a comedy, and then we'll end with like a cheers, a taskmaster, a Frazier, something in that, something in that ilk. Yes, and it's usually those three right now that we're like altering between just a nice straight up sitcom, you know, a reality show whatever, something at the end, to just kind of be like cool During those dramas.
Matt:My phone's generally not out with the exception of oh where do I know that guy from? With the exception of that, I can't, yeah, I can't, give in to that. Look it up, I can't, I.
Eric:I matt shea physically have to know I same, hard, same, and alissa has the patience of saint with me when it comes, because there will be times where it's like several times within a 20 minute window that I'm like wait, no, I know that guy was oh, oh, my God.
Matt:Well, most of the time, most of the time, I do know the person, but the times I don't. Yeah, I have to know. I have to know, because I feel I've let the room down by not knowing hit that person's name off the bat.
Eric:It will live rent free in my head until the end of time.
Matt:I'm trying to wait to the end of the program but, like generally, dramas or whatever I am, I'm locked in. I'm paying attention. We're watching some show, that doesn't matter. Yeah, I'll pull out my phone from time to time. I don't think that's a big deal If it's a movie, fuck. No, that phone is out. I don't even look people up till the end of the movie because I am like imagine, we're in a theater right now. If you pulled out a phone in a theater, I will throw popcorn at you. I've done it and I will continue to do it. You'll throw popcorn, followed by hands, followed by hands and shade throughout.
Eric:Yes. So to further us along on this etiquette of showing a video in person, just to summarize the points we've made so far One everything like if I'm showing you like I need you to watch this video One made so far. One everything like if I'm showing you like I need you to watch this video.
Matt:one everything else paused, get undivided attention get that, get that shit on, do not disturb my friend show to me or in the other and the other because, like any, any sort of like anything else happening.
Eric:My brain will just be panicking the entire time because I cannot not pay attention to both the other angle of this. Let's say we're we're falling to. I love when, when you have a group of like tight friends, you're hanging out living room, you're in front of the tv and we fall into showing shit, showing each other shit on youtube time. Yeah, that's a great time, oh great time. There is a a certain amount of reading the room. When it comes to when your ass needs to pass the baton.
Eric:I I don't know if this is happening to you I'll be like, oh, yeah, let me show you this video. And then you're showing people video and someone like already like have it. Like oh, oh, after this is over, after this is over, I'm gonna show you. I'm gonna show you another, like no, no, you shut the fuck up. We're gonna watch the whole thing, we're gonna absorb it, and then I will pass the baton to you. Then you can put on whatever you want. But also, do not bogart. Do not bogart the search box. Do not bogart the youtube. Yeah, there are people who will fall into this group like, oh, you like that, oh, I'm gonna show you. And then, like you, you end up locked into like fucking 10 videos of like one kind of thing, because one person did not read the room and pass the baton that's the equivalent of like one kind of thing because one person did not read the room and pass the baton.
Matt:That's the equivalent of like not actually partaking in a conversation and listening and just waiting for your turn to talk.
Eric:Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah my lines.
Matt:Exactly, it's the same thing. Only, like you said, read the room. Thou shalt read the room, thou shalt read the room. Know the vibe. Is your video related? Is it going to play? In the playlist in the unofficial playlist that's being created in this YouTube show showing. Is it going to fit? If not, you just want me to see some unrelated video. Pump your brakes.
Eric:Yes, yes, unrelated video pump your brakes, yes, yes, there is a, there is an art to to the ebb and flow of the vibe as we go through these videos.
Matt:Yeah, and if you're, if you're at some party and you're talking to somebody and a video comes up in conversation like oh, that reminds me of the, puts me in mind of a youtube video. Yes, I would. I would say, depending on where you are, if you're able to be like you know what. Actually, here, can I show this to you Just like a. Do you want to see this? Yes, because that opens the person up to be like oh, you know what, send it to me, I'll watch it when I get home.
Eric:Yes, oh my God, that's another thing. I see I'm at a rager and like I'm in a room and like there's like fucking 20 people standing around in this kitchen and we're all like having loud ass conversations. That is not the time to show me a video no, I'm not, I'm like.
Eric:I'm not doing this and it wouldn't come up for me because I know you can't properly hear it no, you can't experience it the way I want you to it's there's no greater hell than when you're desperately like trying to show someone a video but like it's so loud that like they have to do that thing where, like their eyes are off the screen, they're leaning in. Just I'm like. That is why I never put myself in that position, because I wait for an appropriate time to show someone a video. The video times at a party, if you're at a rager, it's at like the two to three m range where like people have started filing out and it's just like it's it's down to like a core group in the living room that are just kind of like we're getting our last, last of our our party adrenaline out.
Eric:We're coming down and like we're about to head home. That's video time that's video.
Matt:Time, that's video. Or just be like blah, blah, blah. Oh yeah, this key and peel sketch. It's so funny, you know what. I'll just text it to you and then that's it. That's it, and then you just gotta let, let it go. Text it to you and then that's it.
Matt:That's it, and then you just got to let, let it go, and I'm I'm saying that as somebody who's it sometimes is hard for me to discover. It's hard for me to discover you haven't seen a certain video that I feel is imperative to my canonical existence and and can't show it to you.
Eric:It's hard for me, yeah, and while we're there on the subject, have you seen, uh, the cute house video, cute?
Matt:house video.
Eric:It's it's a, it's a, it's a little sketch, little sketch comedy. It's uh, no, oh, I, I'm gonna send you a video send me the video.
Matt:I'll send you a video but don't show it to me right now, in the middle of this podcast.
Eric:No, not in the middle of the podcast time and and place. Time and place. Time and place.
Matt:Speaking of killing the vibe yes, or killing a vibe or killing. I think it's time we get to our last question.
Eric:Yes, this comes from at the Jarge on Instagram. You know who you are, you know what you did, you know what you did and I love you for it. Love you, george. Love you, george. What's the proper etiquette for?
Matt:guillotine. Use Now this in the year of our Lord, 2025,. I think this is something we're going to need to know.
Eric:So you know what Matt.
Matt:Everything old can be made new again. It can be made new again. You know there were some the guillotine.
Eric:There were the guillotine, there were pros and cons.
Eric:Pros and cons why that that implement at that time for that revolution for that revolution.
Eric:Etiquette for guillotine use one gonna want to set up and up so like, let's, let's say the quiet parts out loud, you're gonna want this to be public. The guillotine is a public, it's a public, it a public execution.
Matt:It's a public device.
Eric:It's not about just killing somebody. You could do that with a rock.
Matt:No, guillotine is about the theater the guillotine is not merely a punishment, it is also a performance. Yes, and so you're sending a message. It's about sending a message to the people, to the masses. So what you're going to want is you're going to want some sort of public square, uh, you know, main street, if there's steps of a capital, steps of a capital, if there's a, a town square with a gazebo in it, you're going to want to be by the gazebo, but not in the gazebo, because you need to be visible.
Eric:Yes, yes, yes, yes, Got to be. Uh, yes, Got to be upraised platforms, Got it? I'd say at least about like six and a platform's got to be at least six and a half feet off the ground. That way everyone can look. Ideally, ideally, you'd have a kind of realizing the fucked up psychology of of the guillotine, because the way guillotine stages are built, you have to you you're. It's a raised platform, like, probably like a foot or two above the heads of everyone. But that's the thing you are watching someone have their head chopped off while looking through a forest of other heads.
Matt:Correct and what you're going to want to do. What are you going to want to do? I'm going to say you want to think about your audience, you want to think about the message that's being sent. Because I'd say you want the gazebo. In a way doesn't work great, because you want the gazebo. I mean you want the guillotine to be backing up to something, so somebody's not. You don't want somebody looking at the ass of the person in the guillotine. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is proscenium style, proscenium slaughter. Yes, this is a proscenium slaughter. You want everybody on one side, so everyone's got a good view. And the reason I think you want the platform to be raised up a little bit is because I think the best kinds of executions via guillotine are where the head has somewhere to fall, to roll dramatically To roll away, and then some kids in the front row can pick it up and hoist it up.
Eric:I've got the tyrant.
Matt:I've got the tyrant. I've got him. I've got him, stick him on a pike.
Eric:And they're like tossing it around like a beach ball and everyone's having a great time.
Matt:Everyone's having a great time.
Eric:People would get dressed up to go see guillotines. Absolutely, they'd put on their Sunday fives.
Matt:They'd have picnics, you're going to want to erect it at least 24 hours before the execution. That way people, that way people know there's an ominous announcement that you know.
Eric:You have to be here at a certain time ideally make sure you're building it somewhere where and this is like in a perfect world but like you're building it in the town square, but that also just happens to have a perfect like line of sight view to like the little cell, the little basement dungeon that, like the soon to be tyrant, is going to be like sitting it, like they're watching you build the guillotine from their little between the bars.
Matt:They're like yeah, you want them to know how close they are to their demise.
Matt:Yes, but, this is Eric. This is not the French Revolution. This is 2025. For guillotine use today, you're going to want to have some microphones on hand so everyone can properly hear the last statement of the accused. You're going to want, maybe, a podium off to the side with a microphone that somebody can read out the charges before saying you know, do you have any last words? I sentenced you to die fucking off with their head and then let that stuff roll.
Eric:At least a megaphone at least a megaphone at a minimum. A megaphone at a minimum. You've got a proper etiquette. And this is just in terms of like. Again, this is theater. This is performance. This is just in terms of like. Again, this is theater. This is performance. This is grandiose. You got like whoever's pulling the lever. Gotta be wearing that black hood thing.
Matt:Gotta have the black hood.
Eric:The black tunic, the pant, the hood, with a little. Yeah, you know Bare arm, bare big, muscly arms.
Matt:He's not doing anything intensive, he's just pulling a lever and listen, it's about sending the message, it's about putting on a show because, look, there's a reason the all black tuxedo never goes out of style, and that's for formal events and for formal executions. The black hood Always good, yeah, yeah, always great. Stick it in there and off with his head. You know, and I'd say minimum, I'd say honestly minimum, if you're going to go to the labor of constructing a guillotine, of constructing a stage minimum of three, three executions.
Eric:Oh you got. I mean, yeah, you can't, you don't build a gate, just for one.
Matt:It's like boxing. You know, you got to build up to the main event.
Eric:Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Matt:You know, if you're, if you've got one main person being executed, you need two or three opening acts.
Eric:And this similar to the what I was describing to you as I was watching the SNL music like review.
Matt:The 50th concert.
Eric:The 50th concert the feeling there, the vibe there was like I feel like the direction given to each act was do this like it's the finale. Yeah, and I think that's key to proper guillotine use. You're going to want to work up, but you got to give everyone the get your final words out, get their head in there, and then you give it before it drops. It's got to be up. You can't just like all right, neil chop, neil chop, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Matt:Got to let it. Got to let it hang in the air. You got to have an executioner who also has flair right, Because we all know it's a lever.
Eric:You can just go like any asshole, can pull the lever you.
Matt:You can just go like oh, you can do it with your foot while you're reading the Sunday Times, oh my God. But what you need is somebody who strikes a pose, who squares their legs, leans over and makes it look like they're hoisting it over. Shark Like they're. Sisyphus pushing that boulder.
Eric:And then when they're resettingting, they're hauling on that fucking chain, just hauling on the chain one, yeah two, yeah three.
Matt:Yeah, that blade's like 20 pounds, but it doesn't matter. No, no, no we it's.
Eric:It's like watching the ball drop at new york city. Human beings just have. We love to see things go from high place to low place and we all cheer when it gets there. Just lots of different reasons for doing it. High place to low place always a winner. Yeah, yeah, Always really tests well with execution audiences.
Matt:I'm looking forward to getting the guillotine back in action.
Eric:Oh man, to quote AJJ mega guillotine. I love you, mega guillotine. I am voting for you, Thank you.
Matt:Thank you very much. Now, Eric. I think that about does it for our etiquette questions.
Eric:Think that about. Does it? I feel enriched?
Matt:I hope you do and I think you should, and I understand that you have a pop quiz for me.
Eric:Oh, matthew, do I that you have a pop quiz for me? Oh, matthew do I speaking of speaking in a similar vein to ajj. Oh uh, matthew, today's pop quiz. If you'll indulge me, I will, matthew.
Matt:I call this punk or poser, okay I'm gonna read off 23 punk band names this is good, eric, this is good, and you're gonna tell me which ones are real and which ones I made up.
Eric:Yep, yeah, I'm proud of you bud yeah, this is a good one.
Matt:All right, we're gonna pose her punk or poser.
Eric:I'm ready if it's real poser, if it's not, I got it first. Band psycho billy murder scene punk poser made that up. Made that up in high school I, I was gonna.
Eric:I wonder if you've said it to me before, because I swear I've heard that before oh, there's gonna be a bunch in here that I know I've mentioned to you at some point, but also fake ones that I know I've probably mentioned to you at some point. Great, great Second band Fugazi oh, that's punk. That's punk, they are real, they're awesome. If you saw someone in a Fugazi shirt no, you didn't.
Matt:Well, you put some Fugazi on my punk folk playlist yeah, yeah. I liked Fugazi more than a lot of the rest. They're in my upper third.
Eric:Oh you, really I liked Fugazi more than a lot of the rest. They're in my upper third. Oh you, really, I'm over the moon that you were, that you fucks with Fugazi yeah, I did listen to it, Eric.
Matt:Yeah, I know I did listen to it A lot of it Not for me, but Fugazi better than some of the others.
Eric:Good place to start. Next band Amel and the Sniffers Amel. Amel, amel and the Sniffers Poser. That is a real band they're. They're a phenomenal woman fronted punk band out of Australia. So what? I'm one for three, really One for three. I'm checking off the ones that you get, correct? Oh OK, the Stepdaddies.
Matt:Hmm, real Fake.
Eric:Damn.
Matt:Yep, okay, the stepdaddies.
Eric:Hmm, real fake damn. Yep, ah, screm femme, screm femme yes, real fake fuck eric, and you're good at this man that is a nickname we use, for there is a real band called the screaming females, but we just, in the house, refer to them to scrimp them. What's the polite thing to do? Stiff richards, stiff richards uh, punk or poser poser real motherfucker.
Matt:I'm bad at this and you're good at this, ah next band, feral mare feral mare real fake jesus christ.
Eric:That's amazing, I couldn't be worse at this, that's because it's just a different version of wild stallion.
Matt:Sure, yeah, next band propaganda either way, great name great name um, I want it to be, I want it to be real. I'm saying punk that is real okay, a second, I got two I'm up to two, you're two.
Eric:Spoonboy, you there, spoonboy, spoonboy.
Eric:Please, the super zombie Spoonboy. Spoonboy's fake Spoonboy is absolutely real.
Matt:I hate you and Spoonboy, damn you, spoonboy, away with you. Maximum fuck Real boy damn you spoon boy, away with you maximum. Fuck, real fake I give up.
Eric:I, I give up. No, no, no, matt, I believe we're just about halfway through.
Matt:Okay, biff, tannin overdrive you justdrive, you just had to, you just had to.
Eric:I feel like it's real, is that?
Eric:your final answer yeah.
Eric:It is real. Okay, that was a local band.
Matt:One of my best friends in high school. His brother had a band called Biff Tannen Overdrive. My logic was if you're going to pull?
Eric:out a Back to the Future reference for me. If you were to make one up, that doesn't sound like what you'd make up. Yeah, yeah, that was my logic there.
Eric:Flea to Only Fake, fake, that's a band Alyssa and I made up.
Eric:Okay, shite Geist.
Matt:Shite Geist, real Fake, real fake, damn, mother fuck did you? Are these ones you made up for this quiz, or?
Eric:ones you've made up over the course of a couple of these are one like psycho billy murder scene, like that's a fake band me and my friends have been talking about since high school but for the most part we uh, alissa and I put our noodles together. Alyssa helped provide 99% of the actual bands on this list because her music knowledge is encyclopedic. I see Infinite Pizza. I think Infinite Pizza is real. Infinite Pizza is real, local Baltimore band fronted by my good friend Becky, who's going to be a guest on this show soon.
Matt:Yes, she is. Didn't you give me an Infinite Pizza thing on the playlist, or no? Is that why?
Eric:it's familiar. No, oh, I might have. If I haven't, I can think of some good Infinite Pizza songs to add to that playlist. Spitshoe.
Matt:Spitshoe, oh Spitshoe shoe, I don't know. I'm gonna say it's real fake and it is brace, face, brace face.
Eric:That's real. That is real. Also, a Baltimore band. Oh, look at that Bikini.
Matt:Kill. Bikini Kill is fake, real. I hate you.
Eric:I love you All right. Illuminati Hotties.
Matt:That's great. That's a great fucking name and it better be real it better be a band?
Eric:Is your final answer real? It is.
Eric:It is fake.
Eric:Okay, studfinder, all right, all right. This is the beauty of punk band names.
Matt:Why not just call it Dad Joke the Band? I'm going to say fake, that is fake.
Eric:Good, good that it is the Duke Nukems, nice Wow.
Matt:Good that it is the Duke Nukem's Nice, wow, oh, I want to play Duke Nukem now. That's classic gaming for you right there. Duke Nukem, duke Nukem. I'm going to say it's real Fake. That one's me.
Eric:Congratulations on that one Illuminati hotties and stud finder was Alyssa. All right. On that one Illuminati hotties and stud finder was Alyssa All right. We're down to our last three. Mean jeans real, that is real. Okay, mom jeans Fake that is real. Okay. Pissed jeans Fake, that is real. Oh three of them are real Mean jeans mom jeans, pissed jeans, All right of them are real Mean jeans mom jeans, piss jeans, All right, Matt, let me run this through this and they're unrelated.
Matt:They're not like a super group, no no, no, oh, but when? They combine with their powers. Combined so much denim.
Eric:The devil's denim Son is something wrong. You've hardly touched your jinner.
Matt:The devil's denim's the name of that super group.
Eric:The devil wears dickies dante's denim. So running through we had 23 bands and you got one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, eight out of 23. That's not great, hey, you know, we all got those days, god knows. I don't think I thought I figured out a single fucking one of those houses or who they belong to.
Matt:No, but again, you weren't supposed to. It was educational, I was teaching you through your failure boy. I was merely inviting you to guess at something that I didn't think you'd likely know, and if you did I'd be very impressed with you, and I think that is very much the realm here. I learned some real bands and I congratulated you on some fake names that are very funny they're very I.
Eric:And for those of you listening, um, for the real bands you've heard of, if they're on this list, go listen to them. They fucking rule, um. And if there a made-up band, you're welcome. You now have a name for your band. There you go.
Matt:And Eric, I think, on that note, that'll about do it. That'll about do it For this etiquette episode of you Didn't Ask For this. Yeah, you're going to give them the business. I think it's time that we give them the business. I think so. I think so. Well, first and foremost, I do want to say that we do have a Patreon that we'd love you to join, eric. You want to give them the deets?
Eric:Yes, Tell you about our side hustle. So if you subscribe to the Yadaft Patreon for one measly fucking dollar a month, you get access to the Yadaft Discord and we're memeing and dreaming over there, memeing and dreaming, memeing and dreaming. For a mere $4 a month Less than a fucking latte, less than a goddamn latte you get access to the Discord. You get monthly bonus content Oops, all tangents and you get 20% off of all your Daft merch, which you can go buy right now. You can drop everything you're doing right now and go buy a bitchin' mug or a hoodie.
Matt:Or a hoodie or a t-shirt or a fanny pack or other things. We're going to add some more merch there soon. It's youdontask for thiscom slash shop. Of course, we still need those questions from you. You can do that. You didn't ask for this. Gmailcom. Send us an email. You can leave us a voicemail at the thought line at 410-929-5329 and catch us on the social medias. We're mainly on Instagram and blue sky and Tik TOK at. You didn't ask pod. That's the letter. You didn't ask pod. Uh, yeah, so that I think. I think that wraps up the business, eric.
Eric:I think that wraps it up.
Matt:We got a lot of fun stuff planned for you. We got multiple guests lined up for, uh, upcoming episodes and in our very next episode actually is going to be another. You daft and afraid we're going out to the people live, but also pre-recorded. But also pre-recorded. I don't know, Eric. Should we tell them where we're going? Oh, Matthew.
Eric:No, let us build the suspense. Let us build the suspense, Let them wonder.
Matt:But you know we will announce it. We'll give a little teaser when we're a little bit closer in our Instagram. So, at, you Didn't Ask Pa, go there for the heads up, but otherwise I think that'll about do it for this episode of. You Didn't Ask for this From all of us here. My name's Matt J, my name's Eric Poach and, listen, you didn't ask for this From all of us here. My name's Matt J, my name's Eric Poach and listen, you didn't ask, but Mega guillotine, I love you, mega guillotine, I'm voting for you.
Eric:Come on everybody. You know the words. I'm praying for you every day. I'm praying for you every day. Yeah, can we play that legally, oh? Yeah, yeah, we performed it, thank you.