You Didn't Ask For This
You Didn't Ask For This
106 | Sic Semper Philranus
Welcome to 2025! Celebrate the new year with the noblest of activities: the YDAFT Bingo card! Our third addition of the yearly card selection includes our usual predictions for deaths, word of the year, and promises to "get each other into" something. Plus much, much more.
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eric happy 2025, my friend 2025 still alive, truly.
Eric:That is what it is god, we are by, oh, through sheer grit, piss and vinegar urinate acetum and you daft, enters yet another calendar year. We just keep on trucking baby we don't do fiscal in this house.
Matt:No, no we, we just keep, we just keep on going, and I'm proud of us for that likewise yes, we and our little avant-garde edgy. Yes, brave podcast. And actually, you know, you know if it's so edgy you know so so, like you know, on it, on the pulse of society and on the fringes, I want to say as well.
Eric:Yes, subversive.
Matt:Maybe what we need to do for our listenership is we need to come up with some euphemisms for listening to you, daft.
Eric:Ooh, I mean, we're basically the Banksy of podcasts.
Matt:Are we not? Are we, are we not? I've been saying it and so have the people. So, to help the urchins on the street, who might who, who listen to the show, to listen as they hand out their newspapers and offer to shine shoes absolutely. As they, as they climb up those chimneys to start a sweeping uh, they got those airpods in and they, they need to. When somebody says oh hey, what you're listening to, they don't want to give away the ghost.
Eric:No and in true Cockney rhyming fashion, they say oh you know, just having a go at the ear music, having a go at the in music Is that what? You just said the ear music.
Matt:Oh, the ear music.
Eric:Little bit of the waggly talks between my lobes, Ear, lobes. That is God. I love a euphemism.
Matt:That's what I'm saying. So I think we need to create some that the Adaf giants out there can say to one another so they don't you know as a secret society?
Eric:Yeah, because that's how you build a following is you make it even more hard to discover what the show is into the fucking stratosphere is to add as many layers of complexity between potential audience members and our content as humanly possible I've always thought so.
Matt:So what, what euphemism do you think might speak to our show?
Eric:uh, there's, there's, there's some good old, there's some good, like easy wins off the bat, like someone goes, like you there, boy, what, what are you listening to? Oh, you didn't ask, gov, like just straight, like a simple, like you didn't know the shower, eric that's just the name of the show no, it almost is the name of the show.
Matt:I mean, I'm aware that it's not. You didn't ask gov, but the the, the main, who's not asking who's not. Are these euphemisms, eric?
Eric:no, but they are fun. These. These are just deflections. Cockney is basically an entire exercise in deflection okay, they don't need to be caught.
Matt:We I don't know if you know this, eric we are not cockney, what you know? Dickensian orphans, you're talking to pace. I'm I, indeed, I'm not, sir. Damn bit sad, isn't it?
Eric:indeed, I'm not go um, no, but but you've so, uh, uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, having a having a touch of the squonk a touch of the squonk.
Matt:Uh, I like that.
Eric:Maybe here, maybe we can massage are you because you said that in the tone of someone who didn't no no, I like, I like it a lot.
Matt:Let's just punch it up a bit and make it good uh oh yeah, yeah, I'm consoling the squonk.
Eric:Consoling the squonk is very good. Oh, I'm just consoling the squonk a bit Gov Again.
Matt:I don't know.
Eric:The challenge here.
Matt:I didn't even do the accent, I just said Gov Consoling the squonk Gov. I am consoling the squonk Governor. Oi Oi, governor, uh oi oi. That was as american as I could say oi, and I really tried hard. My mouth rebelled against the impulse, uh I'm on.
Eric:I'm on facetiming my uncles. I'm facetiming my uncles.
Matt:That's really good, but you're not holding your phone up um calling the uncles.
Eric:Calling me uncles. Calling me uncles, calling me uncles um, what are you calling them?
Matt:I'm listening to, or what are you listening to? Oh, it's. Uh, I'm trying to think of an yerba mate connection um, oh.
Eric:My current brand is Rosamonte Seleccion Especial.
Matt:Okay, oh, that's what you're saying. That's the euphemism.
Eric:No, that's just what the current Yerba I'm drinking Rosamonte Seleccion Especial.
Matt:Yes.
Eric:I'm not just going to drink regular.
Matt:Rosamonte. When somebody asks you what you're listening to, you should give them a euphemism in a foreign language.
Eric:Yes, I'm not just going to drink regular Rosemont when somebody asks you what you're listening to, you should give them a euphemism in a foreign language yes, oh, my God, hold on. Let me, oh, just listen to a little. Das haben sie nicht verlangt.
Matt:I was looking up German, you were saying what did you say again?
Eric:The title of our show Is what in German? Das haben sie nicht verlangt. One more time, Das haben sie nicht sorry, das haben sie nicht verlangt.
Matt:Okay, if we wanted to go the German route, while not saying the name of the show, I've got Alles in Frage stellen. Alles in Frage stellen, which is questioning everything, even though I'm sure I butchered that pronunciation.
Eric:Uh, here's icelandic hold on I and I can't possibly. I'm just gonna like hold that up. There's no world in which I can even make an attempt at that, so I'm just gonna let google do it for me. Yeah you know, absolutely give, give that a go um yeah, just give that the old. Oh, here's the euphemism. Hey, what are you, what are you listening? Oh, just giving it the old college try. Oh, yeah, just pushing the peach. Just drop an eggplant.
Matt:Just push into the peach.
Eric:That's all I'm doing.
Matt:Fucking dumb. Yeah, that's enough of this.
Eric:Let's start the show. Oh wait, what's our euphemism for starting the show? Fuck this.
Matt:Well, hello everybody and welcome to you. Didn't Ask For this the podcast answering life's least pressing questions. My name is Matthew Shea, my name is Eric Poach and Ericic poach.
Eric:here we are in 2025 2025 and I'm kind of mad about it. Tell me why I'm kind of mad about it because it's 2025. Blade runner is supposed to have happened six years ago. Yep, yep, yep. And here we are, in out. You know, present company excluded the shittiest timeline. Absolutely, I think that's clear I don't have flying cars. I don't have harrison ford chasing me down to try to execute me because I'm a replicant. No, I don't.
Matt:I, I don't we don't have any of the good stuff that we were promised.
Eric:I don't have anyone leaving me little origami, animals and cryptic messages about life and the universe like?
Matt:fuck, oh, so you haven't been getting my messages. It's just a little one of my bits. That's just a little one of my bits.
Eric:It's just a little one of my bits. Every time I leave a room, matt just turns to someone and says it's a shame he won't live. But then again, who does?
Matt:Any whoozle. It is 2025, which means it is time for our annual tradition of picking out the. You didn't ask for this bingo call now. If you are new to the show, welcome hey how you doing how you doing.
Matt:We have been doing this for this is our third year, but second year doing it like as a tradition, yeah, of selecting some things that are going to go on our 2025 bingo cards. We're going to mark them off throughout the year and you know, then, the winner. We have yet to have a winner. We had many people submit their own bingo cards, which you'll be able to do. The link will be in the description of this episode Yep, yep, yep. And, of course, we'll put put on our socials at. You didn't ask pod. That's the letter. You didn't ask pod. All over the place, um, yes, go.
Eric:Oh, I was just gonna say this, this. This reminds me we should add a channel to the discord, that's a bingo channel. So people can like as they, and for those of you now just joining us, uh, if you want to give them a plug.
Matt:Eric, we walked right into it.
Eric:Oh, if you would like to join our discord, head on over to our Patreon where, for just one dollar a month, you get access to our discord, and for four dollars a month you get access to the discord. For just four dollars a month you get access to the discord, you get 20 percent off of our incoming merch and you well, by this point it should be out. Oh yeah, damn, for four dollars a month you get access to the discord. Fuck, for just four goddamn dollars a month, because this is the fifth time I've done this. Take, you get access to the discord, you get 20 off of our merch and you get a monthly bonus episode of oops. All tangents, all tangents absolutely you do.
Matt:those are all true. Patreoncom slash. You didn't ask for this, of course, the link is also in the description. So join us. And yes, idea, eric, we'll make a channel right away to get everybody going. But we had lots of people submit. The first year, we had a few people play along, last year, a whole lot more. Like a dozen or so people sent us cards and maybe more had them at home, but if I don't know about it, I can't keep up with it. Yeah, and then we publish ours, of course, so everyone can look at them. But so Eric's made some options, I've made some options, eric. Let's talk through potential events of 2025.
Eric:Dude the day. Someone gets a bingo, we gotta, and, as we've, oh, we'll make a thing out of it. Oh it's, someone gets a bingo, we gotta, and as we've, oh, we'll make a thing out of it. Oh it's gotta be a thing. We gotta make a whole deal out of it.
Matt:As we've gone on, as we've done multiple of these. Now we've added some definite squares. We won't lead with them, but we have a. We will name a death, we will predict a death. In the first year we did this, I predicted Tony Bennett would die and then he did. Yep, you monster. To be fair, I did game the system a little bit. I knew he was frail.
Matt:So there's that there's the word of the year. Neither of our words last year panned out the word of the year. Neither of our words last year panned out. And then we have a promise to get. This was new last year. To get the other person into something Last year I got Eric into soccer. Eric failed.
Eric:I was supposed to get Matt into Eurovision and it's not. And I just want to clarify for everyone. It is not that Matt doesn't like Eurovision, it's that I failed to tell him when it was being broadcast.
Matt:Yes, I tried. I was ranking the songs and stuff there for a while you had rimmed him toggy up as your number one at one point and he came in second. You didn't? You? Let me fall off the horse here. I know I know you weren't there to tell me to get back on son, but this year. So we've got some traditions. We'll see if new ones come about. But, eric, should we just jump right in? Let's just jump right in. What's the first on your list there?
Eric:first on my list. So do we want to do our like? Get our deaths word of the year, get each other into things out of the way I don't think we should, I don't think we should lead with okay, let's, let's save that.
Matt:Let's see, let's save it, let's, let's warm up a little bit.
Eric:Um, okay, right out the gate, an ai will be elected to a seat of government, and, and, and mind you, I'm not shooting for presidencies here, I think. I think they're like it could be some fucking flyover town in in like the middle of goddamn ohio a population of like 200, they'll all just write in fucking chat GPT.
Matt:I like that a lot. I think, uh, I think it is possible. So are you thinking that that would be like secret? Like it's revealed, the person was AI.
Eric:Ooh, I would accept Okay. So yeah, it turns out a political candidate was just like ai, generated and no one was paying attention.
Matt:I would love that I would.
Eric:That would be my ideal scenario, honestly. Um, I think that'd be hilarious, absolutely. But I will also accept just just a town, a podunk town, just saying, ah, fuck it. Chat, gb, chat, gpt're in charge, just ask them what we should do about our infrastructure.
Matt:Yeah, all right. Now I have a couple of different conspiracies or conspiracy adjacent topics. Love that. And this first one Eric, it's going to come out, I'm coming out strong. Okay, harambe will be revealed to still be alive. Yes, god Never die. False flag. Yes, harambe lives. Hashtag Harambe lives.
Eric:That was a zookeeper in a gorilla suit Harambe lives. I love that.
Matt:That is my big, that is my. That's where I'm starting.
Eric:And that is a very, that is a prediction full of, because I legitimately believe that's where our timelines diverged, that's where it all started to go awry. Harambe's death was where it all started going downhill.
Matt:So Harambe's still alive. I'm calling the shot, yep.
Eric:Ooh, careful with that phrasing. Ooh, okay, love that Hilariously. My very second item here. Okay, love that Hilariously. My very second item here. Okay, an animal previously thought extinct will be discovered still alive.
Matt:I have something similar to that. I have something similar to that. I like animal thought to be extinct still alive.
Eric:I think if Harambe turns out to still be alive, I get that. I think that counts for both of these.
Matt:I mean, it's a big enough event. Yeah, it's a big enough event that it would count for both. And I think, um, like right before not shortly before recording this episode, because, spoiler alert, it's actually still 2024 recording this it was just announced that we did it. The murder hornet has been eradicated. It's dead, it's gone. We killed it. It could easily come back Because you're telling me like how do you even know?
Matt:How do you know there's no murder hornets? How do you know? They could be hiding like the cicade. They could be anywhere, and then they come back 13 years from now.
Eric:They get discovered in a McDonald's on a bus.
Matt:Absolutely, oh don't worry, I've got a Luigi-related one oh thank God. So I'm going to skip my next one, because you kind of teed me up, for melting ice caps reveal a partially preserved dinosaur. Love it, love the shit out of that. I'm actually excited for it to happen. I am stoked for that, and that's when we say, hey, you know what All those fossil fuels were worth it.
Eric:That's when Exxon comes out and says you're welcome Someone owes us an apology would be stoked beyond belief. I will also say this it was a strong. I had to actively keep myself from getting too into the bummer zone with a few of these oh sure, I got to some that are a little bit bummery, because it's the balancing act of what I think will happen versus what I hope will happen.
Eric:Okay, all right. Which also tees me up for this one Someone will get murdered by a drone, and I don't mean about like a war drone.
Matt:I was going to say, Eric, that's happening right this very minute.
Eric:I'm talking about, like the fucking Jersey drones. I'm talking like some, or a drone will be used like a, a commercial home drone will be used as a home drone.
Matt:Home drone will kill someone. I like it. I love it. I want some more of it. Now. This one is based on a conspiracy theory my dad believes in. Okay, what? This is something my dad you don't believe it.
Eric:But no, no, no, dad, super does, I have come around to it something.
Matt:My dad you don't believe it, but your dad, super, does I have come around to it.
Matt:When my dad first suggested this, I said okay, but now I've come around to it and maybe you have too, and you just haven't realized it. I'm going to suggest that there is a conspiracy that will be revealed around student driver bumper stickers, slash magnets being fake, some sort of mass distribution of new driver learning to drive. Be kind share these kind of bumper stickers. I have seen a huge influx of them, they're seemingly everywhere, and I've taken a look at some of the people behind the wheel and I don't mind telling you they don't look very studious. I'm suggesting there is a company out there purposely selling these stickers, knowing that these people are not students, knowing they're not selling them to educators, and for what purposes, I'm not quite sure I was going to ask.
Eric:Is it so they get treated nicer? Is it so they're less likely to get pulled?
Matt:over. I think there's all kinds of angles. Yeah, the cops might turn a blind eye to it, or let them off with a warning, or you'll you'll get out of their way, or you won't tailgate them, or whatever the fuck I mean, I know there are people who straight up put baby on board in their thing just to keep people from driving aggressively near them that I mean there you go.
Eric:That's what I'm saying that is exactly what I'm saying you got a baby on board.
Matt:I know I'm baby.
Eric:I'm the baby on board. I know I'm baby. I'm the baby on board, okay.
Matt:All right If you say so. Do you remember that time in college we were driving back from a party and uh, we are. Dd was yes and uh, or, I'm sorry, you were the.
Eric:I was going to say, if this is the story I'm thinking of, I was. I was going to say, if this is the story I'm thinking of, I'll tell you who wasn't driving that night, who I saw arguing with a tree in the front yard.
Matt:Yes, we are thinking of the same story. He had quite a bit to drink and he did fight a tree, but then you drove us home and the whole way home.
Eric:I need to correct the record here. Sorry, matt, didn't fight a tree. Argued with yes that's true.
Matt:uh, that's true. He did debate a tree, yes, um, and then you were driving his home and I viscerally remember this because he just had a trash can that he was like head down in the whole time, but every five seconds you would hit the slightest of bumps and he'd go. Precious cargo, poach, precious cargo.
Eric:Yes, that is burned into my memory. That night is just seared into my memory.
Matt:It was a wild night.
Eric:You would say it into the bucket.
Matt:And then I brought him home and I had to change him because he was like I'm ready for bed and he put his arms up and I was like, okay, I didn't know I was doing this tonight, he, he surrendered that.
Eric:Uh, I will all say, uh, this is one of my most beloved memories. He, he, he, he. He took me. He was in the living room. He was sitting down. He could not stand up. He was. He was like I need to get up, I need to get, we need you, we need to get poach, poach, I need you.
Matt:I was like, I was like yes, what, what, what?
Eric:I had already told him I was driving home. So I'm like what more could you want? Tell me I can't do this. What he's like, I need you to tell me I can't do it. I was like you cannot do this, you. You can't fuck you poach he needed an enemy to thwart. He like he reached that point, he and I cannot stress this he needed some a foe he.
Eric:He needed a foe. He was so shit-faced and combative in the healthiest way imaginable, because it was just getting me to tell him he can't do it. So he could say fuck you, poach, and get into the car Don't tell me what I can't do. But him also arguing with a tree. He was an absolute angel with everyone else.
Matt:Anyway, moving on, next on my list is Timothy Chalamet. Oh Will be arrested, but for noble reasons.
Eric:Ooh, I was hoping for that arrested, but you know.
Matt:Arrested for, you know, public protest.
Eric:Yeah. Or you know something of the like, or something of that like or something of that ilk, something of that ilk I have genetically modified pets will start being sold. Oh, I hate that.
Matt:Yeah, I hate it, I hate it Bespoke pets.
Eric:Cause it's a hop skip and a jump to like, like we're, we're within the next five years. Eugenics is what it is Like, truly, gattaca is going to become a thing. Oh, I know, but it's. I envision it kind of like if you've seen the sixth day, yes, With Sir Arnold Schwarzenegger?
Matt:I have not, but I'm culturally aware of it when he's getting his dog at the beginning of the movie.
Eric:There's like a service that clones pets. We're like, oh did, did Skippy die? Bring them right back home. I hate it. And like they're like oh, we can modify them. You want softer teeth, no bark. Like I think that will. We've been doing that to dogs for thousands, it's true, but we're going to. But when I say genetically modified, I mean like we're CRISPR technology, fucking editing genes.
Matt:Absolutely. You know, it's horrifying and that is the timeline we live in, is it not? Is it not? Is it not All right? The next thing, since I mentioned it already, I've got a Luigi related one. Oh, luigi, now I am not sure in the timeline of this. Luigi, now I am not sure in the timeline of this. I don't know that any sort of trial will actually begin for Luigi in 2025. But if it does, he'll be freed on jury nullification. Hell, yeah, that's my prediction. We are not endorsing one way or the other, no, uh, any sort of behavior. I am merely making a prediction on the outcome of a trial. Yeah, all right, how about we move on? What's your next one? Uh?
Eric:it will be revealed that a high profile billionaire has hunted human beings for sport.
Matt:Oh eric I love it, I love it, I love it, and I think it has happened.
Eric:Oh, I, we. I think we've had this intellectual exercise before, but the short version is think of how much money it would require to hunt human beings for sport and get away with it. I guarantee you Elon Musk has that kind of money a hundred times, of course he does.
Matt:So the? Uh, I think that is very possible. I think that's very possible. It's already happened and we could learn of it. And, um, my next thing, eric, let's go a little lighter. We've been going a little dark here for a little bit. Okay, I'm going to talk about a staple of television. And he's coming back, baby he, he's coming back, he's. It hasn't been gone very long, he only retired a couple years ago.
Matt:But maury povich, oh maury, maury, coming back maury povich will return with tastelessly a new show called tuesdays with maury that is a needle you want to thread tuesdays with maury maury povich is gonna say what maury, could you ask for? What maury could you ask for?
Eric:oh man, that's what I'm suggesting I, I, I've loved that good, uh, I have uh also on a on a lighter note. I'll have to circle back to one. I skipped just to keep it on the light note, and this was. Alyssa brought this one up to me and I'm like cosign, we're going to start seeing a movement with Norwegian slow TV coming to major networks and streaming services.
Matt:Are you familiar with slow TV? No, I don't believe I am.
Eric:It's heavily popular in Norwayway. I'm getting that impression. It is basically like long form, like slice of life television, but taking to the absolute, most extreme, where it's just like a half hour of watching someone and this is this airs on their television networks. This isn't tiktok, this is not on Instagram. This is we're just watching, like someone's grandmother knit for like a half hour.
Matt:Interesting.
Eric:That's. I think that will start seeing a broader audience in America.
Matt:I want to see someone in America try to recreate Gogglebox. I want the American Gogglebox. Oh my God, dude, gogglebox is so popular in the UK and I have to send you some clips I desperately want. I love Gogglebox. Gogglebox is a TV show of people watching TV. It is incredible, doesn't it sound shitty? It isn't.
Eric:But I can already see the appeal.
Matt:it's like already love saying goggle box it's like the same group of people who you literally are. Just it's. It is a. They are watching the tv and there's a camera pointed back at them and they are just bickering and talking and it's so good. There's a great um goggle box compilation of them of like goggle box responding to the crowns like season three, like with the first season with diana. That is so good. That video is so good and I'm sending it to you yes, please um, so yeah, in america.
Matt:You know what? I'm putting it on my list american goggle box american goggle box.
Eric:I just love saying goggle box absolutely.
Matt:Should we be? Should we pepper in one of our um, our things?
Eric:but you have a speaking of first well, I was gonna say, speaking of america, someone is going to majorly deface the statue of liberty wow, yeah, that kid that killed my vibe eric.
Matt:Oh, I hope it did. That was dark yeah because we were talking about goggle box. We're talking about goggle box now you're talking about lady liberty being def, even more defaced than she already has been. Am I right if it was?
Eric:like, am I right? Got him political. Um, I would love it if, like if it was something like someone just drew a giant mustache on. I'm surprised, in the however long that statue has been here, yeah, that no one has attempted to put a mustache on it, eric it's pretty tall, but like I don't know if you've seen, how creative taggers and and graffiti artists can get it's pretty tall unless you're fucking spider-man, and even then, even in the latest two games, you still can't even access it.
Matt:It seems like it's a bummer. It's stupid, really a deep flaw. It's one of the only flaws of those two games, if I'm being honest with you. Now, eric, if we're being political, we're being political.
Eric:If we're being political.
Matt:I have one that's a little political. I'm going to say it. We didn't talk about this. You might not like that. I'm going to suggest this. Oh man, there will be an assassination attempt on Puxatawney Phil. Oh my God.
Eric:That's right. There are some institutions in this country, young man, that you cannot attack.
Matt:The inner circle being one of them.
Eric:Yeah.
Matt:I, of course, being a Pennsylvanian, a native Pennsylvanian, am well versed in the lore of Puxatawney Phil, and they are no stranger to controversy.
Eric:Yeah.
Matt:And this, this will be. There will be some sort of heinous act, god, some sort of heinous attempt on the life of Puxatawney Phil, a groundhog well over 100 years old.
Eric:I would pay any. I do not. I want no harm to come to this animal, but what I will say is this I can think of nothing funnier on this planet than the image of a gunman emerging from the crowd, fucking, taking At gobbler's knob. Fucking, taking aim at Phil, and then one of the keepers tackling phil, tackling phil like a secret service agent and then they.
Matt:Then they put they have to put a big fake square bandage on the side of his ear and the guy probably yells sick Semper Phil Rannis or something like that. Or some shit like that. But I'm serious, nobody gets hurt. This is coming off a controversial year because, I don't know if you heard, in the months following Groundhog Day, many people don't think about Plexiton Phil, but I do.
Eric:I do, I check up on him.
Matt:And guess what, eric, this is true. You can look this up.
Eric:He's a flat earther.
Matt:Plexitani, phil sired two groundhogs this year and that has never been recorded before. And so the inner circle have said don't you worry, we're getting rid of those fucking groundhogs. They will not inherit their father's throne. Phil will not be threatened by some usurper child.
Eric:This is real Eric. This is really incredible. I'm just imagining. Fucking I can never say his name.
Matt:Puxatawney Phil.
Eric:Puxatawney Phil, just fucking going full. There will be blood. Bastard in a basket. Bastard in a basket the yes, absolutely.
Matt:I think that's true at his little resort that he lives in, because of course I don't know, if you're aware of this he doesn't live at gobbler's knob, eric he, he he's only put in gobbler's knob the morning of groundhog's day, that's it I should have left you in that hole I found you in. You're nothing but an afterbirth. God, there will be blood's. A great movie and I have to see it again.
Eric:It's so good, I could talk like Daniel Day-Lewis.
Matt:So, Eric, why don't we pepper in now what we're going to get each other into?
Eric:Okay.
Matt:Now I'll go first, because I've already said mine on this podcast. I said it months ago and I feel a little bit bad, but I already said I was doing it and you've started on this path. I'm getting you into Survivor.
Eric:Yeah, which is a goddamn shame because I am. It's an instant win for you pretty much at this juncture.
Matt:It's going to be. But let me be clear. You're saying this because you just completed watching your first ever season of Survivor. Yes, season 47, the most recent season. You watched it live with Alyssa. I'm very proud of you. But this is New Era Survivor and New Era Survivor is still fucking finding its footing. I'm sorry, jeff, it still is not up to snuff with the Golden Age. You don't know the lore. You don't know what years constitute the Golden Age. You don't know the lore. You don't know what I even refer. What years constitute the Golden Age? No, eric, I'm getting you a playlist of much must-watch seasons. We're gonna, maybe we'll do an Oops, all Tangents, just about the lore of.
Eric:Survivor.
Matt:I would love that Because there's context you need to know Like I want you to come over and I'll give you a PowerPoint presentation. I have seen every single second of Survivor that has ever been published and, up until they stopped making it for reasons unknown, I've seen every Ponderosa video and I bet you don't even know what a Ponderosa video is. When you get voted off the island after the point of the merge, when you would otherwise be in the jury, you start living on Ponderosa, another island nearby, where they keep everybody in nice little villas. That's cute and it used to be. When you got voted out and you went to Ponderosa, they made a little. I just got voted off Survivor and you went to ponderosa. They made a little. I just got voted off survivor and this is my ponderosa video is how everyone started and you you got to see them arrive, that you did the weigh-in, you got to see their first meal and everybody airs their dirty laundry and then the next day they're playing ukuleles or some shit and I love that it was. It was very nice and they stopped fucking doing them on the YouTube channel and I don't know why, and they need to bring it back.
Matt:Okay, it's just a little rant about the Ponderosa videos of survivor, and this is what I'm talking about. So like, yes, you did watch a season of survivor and it delights me that you seem to have genuinely enjoyed it. It gripped me. You said to me so this is, we're recording this the day after the current season ended and you are watching it the next day Cause you've you've got on the Hulu or whatever, and you texted me to say this is the first time in my life. I am genuinely eagerly anticipating watching a, a finale of reality television.
Eric:Yes.
Matt:And it warms my soul, not the concept of you getting into a reality TV program, the concept of you getting into Survivor.
Eric:Yeah, I understand, that is, I see you. Okay, so it's not an instant green square for you yet.
Matt:I don't think it's an instant. I want you to be able to talk to another Survivor superfan with some level of confidence. I want a buff. You want a buff, I want a buff. We'll get you a buff. I don't even have a buff, although.
Eric:I did get my mom a buff.
Matt:I got my mom a buff as a Christmas gift for you, you, although I did get my mom a buff. I got my mom a buff as a Christmas gift for you. You didn't ask for this. Buffs, maybe. Maybe we can get them. You didn't ask for this buffs, maybe we can get them buffs. So that's mine Now. I know it feels a little like a gimme because you're already starting down the path, but I stated months ago that this was going to be my bingo square. You did, but yours remains a mystery to me.
Eric:Well, not too much of a mystery, matt, because I'm doubling or nothing. I am getting you into Eurovision Now, eric. I thought we discussed this. Did we? Discuss this Discussed the Okay, hey, because I really want to talk about Eurovision with you.
Matt:Okay, all right, eric, if you feel that strongly about it, I do. If you feel that strongly about it, it's either that or metal. And I'll be trying either way Now. Metal is different than punk that.
Eric:I've already planted the seeds by giving you a folk punk playlist. Yes, and I've still got a little ways to go.
Matt:I've already planted the seeds by giving you a folk punk playlist. Yes and I, I, I've still got a little ways to go. I'm not. I've progressed since we've last discussed.
Eric:I now listen to the Jesse Wells playlist you sent me. I listened. It's my daily, it's like when I'm driving to work.
Matt:I added two more songs. He's got a new album, his third, one of 2024. Tight all creatures, one of 2024. Tight All Creatures, great and Small. It's just his most recent tight. It's like six tracks. It's like a mini album, but I put Autumn on there, which is very good, and his song Turtles, which I just adore because it's such a delight. Also, I own a turtle, so you know it's special and close to my heart. How about that? Okay, eric, but you got to do the work. I'm serious, we'll do. I am prepared to have you over here and be like, sit down, I'm starting a powerpoint and like here are the survivors you need to know okay, okay I also.
Eric:Are you already into the traders, because that's about to start and there's a lot of this is super into the traitors and we, we everyone should watch the traitors.
Matt:It is the best worst show ever made. It's so stupid and so bad and every second of it is a delight.
Eric:Yeah, we've been watching house of villains.
Matt:Yes, Well, I I know half that cast from watching the challenge with Lindsay. Lindsay got me into the challenge.
Eric:Alyssa also loves it. Oh, if it's reality, aly. If it's reality, alissa is like a reality show okay.
Matt:Well, we gotta get a list of injured spirits with fucking reality tv. We gotta get alissa into some, like you know, worthwhile television.
Eric:Um, but like you know, I mean she also watches a bunch of work that she doesn't exclusively watch reality we gotta get, we gotta get alissa on the right path.
Matt:You know that's what I'm worried about what I'm saying is what I'm hearing is I'm have reason to be worried that Alyssa doesn't watch anything with a script and a cinematographer. She do, she do, okay, all right, okay. So I'm getting you a survivor and that's that.
Eric:Okay, I'm getting you into Eurovision.
Matt:There we go.
Eric:God help me.
Matt:I'm going to get you into the greatest reality show competition and you will get me into one of the most popular real competitions. How about that? Yeah, there it is. I have a bit of a sad one next. Oh, it feels like almost a given, given the history. Okay 2025 is a big year for gamers, big, big year. Okay, 2025 is a big year for gamers, big big year Because 2025 is the scheduled release of Grand Theft Auto 6. And it has been a minute. I believe 2013 is when GTA 5 came out.
Matt:Yeah so it has been a long time coming and I'm going to say, say it's gonna be a little longer. That shit will be delayed to 2026. That's my prediction and they'll deliver they'll deliver well listen, when rockstar delays a game and they come out with it whenever that is, I feel like everybody, everybody is happy, because when they say it ain't ready, it's not up to our standards.
Matt:I believe them I would always rather that be the case I would always rather that be the case, but I'll be bummed. I'll be bummed I'll be bummed.
Eric:Uh, speaking of bummers, I have there will be a high profile genetic identity theft. Walk me through that, eric. So intriguing. So this kind of ties back to the horrific eugenics Gattaca, yes, coming future. I think someone is going to use someone and I'm sure this is already happening. That's why I added high profile genetic identity theft. Using someone's DNA, blood, hair spit, what have you to? Essentially steal their identity and access shit that can only be got to by biometrics.
Eric:I'm talking about stuff like someone's going to have all their shit stolen from a Swiss bank account because someone got a hold of their blood and hair. Alright okay. Someone's going to pass them off themselves off as someone else using okay, genetic trickery all right, I like it.
Matt:I mean, I hate it, it terrifies me, but I like it. And you know what eric we've? We've had some bummers, so here's another one. This is one I wrote down at some point during the year. What it means I can't tell you, but what I wrote down was slinky linked to cancer. Slinky linked to cancer, what does it mean? How could it work? I don't know. But it's not for me to say it falls downstairs.
Eric:It thins your hair. Everyone loves a slinky, oh god everyone loves oh my god fuck cancer. God damn fuck slinkies everyone loves this.
Matt:I'll give an actual. Everyone loves a slinky everyone everyone.
Eric:I think about that shit non-stop. Like what is the thing? Like that we played with on the regular that, like 50 years from now, people like can you believe they gave play-doh to children?
Matt:oh god, I just I had some play-doh earlier this year as a fidget toy. Uh, it's great solution, yes and it's silent.
Eric:Um, here's one. This one is actually I, I, I, this one I got. I want this to just be the case. It would delight. It would be one of those like oh, what tell me? Uh, new tolkien notes slash stories will be discovered. They're gonna find some, some jrr manuscripts rattling around in someone's garage.
Matt:And Eric, I have one in the similar vein. Ooh, the winds of winter will set an official publication date.
Eric:Ooh, shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
Matt:Really, truly, yes, it's a long shot at this point.
Eric:It's sad to say. We've had topics such as genetically engineered pets, billionaires hunting people for sport, yet somehow that feels like the longest shot of anything here.
Matt:Yes, in case anyone is unfamiliar, the Winds of Winter is the sixth planned book in the Song of Ice and Fire series.
Eric:Little story you might have heard of it.
Matt:Song of Ice and Fire series, better known to you as Game of Thrones if you don't know what Song of Ice and Fire is, and so that book has still not come out, despite it being I think 2012 was when Dance with Dragons came out, I think, so it's been a minute. A whole series of television program adaptation ended, uh, and there are supposed to be seven books. So, yeah, so hopefully it comes out.
Eric:Have I told you my theory about this? Tell me. My theory is a that what we saw in the show is what he has written. It is 100 like and he's changing it uh, uh and then. But because the writers of the show fumbled the fucking landing of that so hard because, they did a. What was it like? A six episode final it was something like that six or eight yeah if they had given it the appropriate number of episodes, given everything, the time it was due, it would have landed yeah I think much more successfully, but they tried to cram all of it in to such an unmanageable space that they absolutely blundered it.
Eric:Now everyone hates those plot points and that ending, and now george is like well, fuck now, because rewrite the whole fucking thing to just go nerdy for a hot second here.
Matt:Danny, going insane is not out of the realm of possibility, is not even inappropriate. She they just didn't give enough air time to her spiral so it seemed like it came out of nowhere it's like she woke up one day and she's like all right, I think I'll kill everyone now so the, it makes total sense for a targaryen to have ended up there, but the, you know, it just didn't. It just wasn't well written because those two idiots wanted to move on to their next Confederate series, which didn't even happen anyway.
Eric:No, yeah, they wanted they. They fucking, they fucked over Game of Thrones so they could get to writing for Star Wars. And then they fucked the dog so hard on that that Star Wars was like no, no, we don't want any part of you, which good Anyway. I wouldn't want to hire them no.
Matt:Look at their resume. Yeah, anyway, back to our list.
Eric:Here we go, ready for this. Tell me Lab grown meat enters mass production. When I say lab grown, I mean indistinguishable from, from like actual meat. I hate it here. Well, here's what. I want that so badly. I want that so, so badly. But unfortunately, lab grown meat enters mass production and the meat industry responds violently.
Eric:So you're saying you would be pro replacing the meat industry with non-meat, with oh my god if, if they could give me fake meat that is indistinguished from a cow, I would switch to that instantaneously. One of the when we talk about like carbon emissions and like terrible shit for the planet, the meat industry. Far and away.
Matt:Yes, yes, we all know about the cow feces yeah it, it is like is truly like.
Eric:It is so fucking terrible for our, for our planet. And like if I could, if I could have the ability to eat a and and that, and just like morally knowing like, oh, I can have a steak and nothing had to die to make this dope okay, well, we're not 100 on the same page there, but that's fine.
Matt:Uh, the I'll just say there's some terrible things that happen in the meat industry. Um, that's true. I also subscribe to the theory that humans have always eaten meat, since the day we arrived on this planet, and always will oh yeah, no, no, like it's two things can be true. Yes, I need protein, but also, and and before I can hear the letters coming from the vegans and vegetarians meat is not the only source of protein. We know that.
Eric:Yeah, that's what I, that's what I'm getting at. It's like if I can get that dietary requirement from a substance that is, in this, distinguishable from animal meat but didn't require the meat industry to exist. Fuck.
Matt:Yeah Well, I think that's very noble of you and I also think we'll be having another, linked to cancer, in our next bingo square. I'm going to go a little close to this date, a little topical, a little a little. In january 2025, tiktok will be rescued within 24 hours of the ban. Oh yeah, I am putting a time limit on it two days before I don't get the square. Okay, 24 hours day. Okay, I day of ban.
Eric:I absolutely agree that I almost had that on my list um.
Matt:I was like bootleg tiktok was, was going to be one of my. I mean could happen, could, could very well happen. I mean this, it yeah all right, what do you got, eric? What's your next one?
Eric:here we go. Ben and jerry's releases pizza flavored ice cream. Do they not have it? I think they've tried. They were like we've tried. Well, sorry, I might getting like be getting my wires crossed, because I know that, um, jelly belly, when they were doing, uh, the, the birdie bots, like every flavored beans, uh thing, the, the flavor profile they got for the vomit flavored jelly bean was from a failed pizza flavored jelly bean that they tried to do.
Eric:I don't know if Ben and Jerry's has has tried it. I've had pizza flavored ice cream uh, from little baby's ice cream in Philadelphia, which, if you ever get a chance, check that shit out. They're amazing. But I would love it Just just just a little fun little call shop Like Ben and Jerry's would love it.
Matt:Just just just a little fun little call shop like, yeah, ben and jerry's like fuck it. Yeah, I did a quick search just now and found that they do have ice cream pizza but they do not have. I'm search, I'm on ben and jerry's website and doing the search in all their flavors.
Matt:There are no results for pizza it'll be pizza flavored, so they do not have a pizza flavored ice cream it'll be called mama crema with it I hope okay, all right, uh, eric, are you familiar with the world's largest ball of twine? I am, in fact it's in caulker city, kansas, not to be confused with the largest ball of twine in minnesota, famously uh put into song by Weird Al Yankovic. I'm talking about the actual world's largest ball of twine, cocker City, kansas. It's going to be stolen, eric. Someone's going to steal, the largest ball of twine, which weighs over 22,000 pounds. But, somebody will steal it.
Eric:Yes, this one was also an Alyssa contribution. I also don't. I and this is going to be the most subjective bingo square I have ever put forth.
Matt:Okay, Maybe next year we should put out a call for listener submissions. Ooh, we should, we should. We should put out a call for listener submissions oh, we should, we should, we should.
Eric:Oh yes, 2025 will be bisexual as fuck. Okay, I mean I feel like 2024 was already there I don't know, 24 pretty bisexual I don't know how you judge that, but bisexual as fuck, we'll know.
Matt:We'll know it when we see it. We'll know it when we experience it everyone will be sitting.
Eric:Weird everyone will have multiple beverages in front of them at any given point.
Matt:We'll know it when we experiment with it. I'm curious to see what happens are you ready for a word of the year, Eric?
Eric:Oh, I'm ready. Okay, what is your word of the year. My word of the year, skibbity.
Matt:Skibbity.
Eric:Yes.
Matt:As in Skibbity Ohio, riz Correct, but just Skibbity, skibbity. Okay, I want a similar root with like a quote unquote, new word.
Eric:Okay, are you ready? I'm ready. Corpo-cuck, you have the better answer. I am all in behind corpo-cuck.
Matt:The word of the year 2025, corpo-cuck. You heard it here first and you might be asking asking what does it mean? Uh, you could say something. I, if I were to use it in a sentence, I'd say oh yeah, my co-worker jerry, he's a real corpocuck well, you know, you know the, you know the, the, the, you know cuck cry compose. Man, we are dancing that line.
Eric:Huh, hey look, two things can be true Murder shouldn't happen, and it can be funny, it can definitely be funny, luigi Mangione, anyway, luigi, oh, the skits that I've seen online.
Matt:they, oh, every single one of them is so delightful, um, ah, it's so good anyway, uh, here's an uplifting story. Okay, a correction from what one of the greatest sins of 2024, joey chestnut, will return to the nathan's hot dog eating competition. God, and july 4th can happen once again. Yes, yes, god, yes, without uh, who? Let me ask you do you remember what happened at the nathan's hot dog contest this year?
Eric:yeah, it was because you were the one who told me no, no, no, I I don don't mean Joey Chestnut not being allowed to compete, I mean because he didn't compete.
Matt:Do you remember what happened?
Eric:Oh no.
Matt:I didn't watch. Of course you didn't. No one did. Why would we? We're not watching for the? For 10 plus years we have not been watching the hot dog eating competition. We have been watching to see how many of the damn dogs, how many of them glizzies, he could, how many glizzies chestnut could guzzle. Okay, and what did happen? I happen to know this. I forget the exact number. I think it might've been 64 was the winning number in of hot dogs in this year's Nathan's competition and the guy did it in 10 minutes, joey does that even touch Joey, joey?
Matt:Chestnut. That same year, there, that same, that same day, did an eating competition in a hot dog eating competition, and I think Texas. That was only five minutes long and he ate 63. Suck a dick, nathan. So like, come on, I like to think that we all know who's the king. The king stays king. The king stays king.
Eric:I also like. I just like imagining that the Nathan's hot. Once they got they kicked Joey Chestnut. It was so unwatched that you had to like find like courtroom sketches of the hot dog contest. It's like the closest you'll get to actual coverage of this event.
Matt:Oh man.
Eric:Now.
Matt:I'm down to it, eric, I've got. I've got two left. Oh, I've got four left.
Eric:OK, besides the death, I yeah, including my death I have three left. Ok, I have to two of the regulars, and then I have a fucking. I labeled this one as a Hail Mary. I'll save that for dead last.
Matt:Okay, here's my next one. This is one that I wrote down at some point throughout the year. Again, don't know what it means. Someone tries to cancel white bread. Okay, I don't know what, I don't know how, but I don't know how. There you go. Why, there you go.
Eric:I don't want to scribe motivate anyone. But yeah, no, I'll, I'll stand behind that. There you go. Oh, here we go, just casually dropping this. A new nation will be formed, sure, yeah, just put it on. Why not? Why not like it?
Matt:truly, that's at this point at this point, you know like we're all on our way out, aren't we? So there might not be democracy in 10 months, so why not? Yeah, why not Get in on it? Let's us make one.
Eric:We could form a splinter nation from Sealand, absolutely.
Matt:Yes, we'll just pull up in a kayak and say we are now a nation, new Sealand, we too are a nation yes uh, I'm gonna say this has happened once before, but it will happen again.
Matt:Simon and garfunkel will reunite for one night only. I think it is a real hail, mary, they fucking hate each other. So, um, I don't know if you know this, but the last time they reunited, which was like in the fucking 90s, I think, um, they, I, I don't have anything pulled up, this is just a tangent. So I don't know if this is 100 accurate, but what I've always heard is they were kept separate until the concert was beginning and they like approach from two different backstages. It was in central park, this concert, and they played a whole lot of like paul simon's like solo stuff, like me and julio down at the schoolyard and that kind of stuff. And when they're singing me and julio down the schoolyard, garfunkel looks so pissed to be singing it and Simon looks so pissed that Garfunkel is singing Like how bad do they need the money?
Matt:They hate each other, man, god damn. But anyway I say one night, only one night. One night only. They reconcile for one. Hey, if Oasis can do it, they can do it, anyone can do it. That's what I'm saying. Okay, so I have two regulars and a death.
Eric:I have a death and a Hail, mary.
Matt:All right, then why don't I knock out my last two? Then we'll get your Hail Mary, I've got Ikea. We'll test assembled furniture. Oh, that's what I'm saying to you test assembled furniture.
Eric:Oh, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, that's what I'm saying to you the time. Brothers, sisters, please heed the call. That's right, the times they are changing.
Matt:Speaking of Timothee Chalamet. My God, he looks good in that movie. Anyway, complete unknown. He sounds just like Bob Dylan. The last thing I got here is because they've talked about it. Uh-huh. I don't know if you're aware of this, but woody harrelson and matthew mcconaughey suspect reveal they're the same person suspect they are brothers like, actually biologically.
Matt:Oh, and they've talked about doing a d test and the only reason they haven't is Matthew McConaughey is scared of finding out that his father is not his father, oh man. But they do have reason to suspect that they are biological brothers.
Eric:That is nuts, and.
Matt:I'm going to suggest they will do that DNA test this year and it will be confirmed that they are. Holy shit, I never even realized that was on the table yeah, oh yeah, it's very much on the table because they discovered that um mcconaughey's mom and woody harrelson's dad had a thing at a certain point. Yeah, I think that's how it was. Yeah, oh my god also matthew mcconaughey's dad had died having sex with his mom. Oh, little fun fact. That's how his dad died and he stated that's how he also wishes to die.
Eric:I mean, if you're gonna go out.
Matt:No, that's true. He had a heart attack while having sex with Matthew McConaughey's mom. Going and coming, coming and going.
Eric:Yep, there you go. Tide goes in, tide goes out. Absolutely All right, all right, all right.
Matt:All right. So what is your Hail, Mary, Eric let's?
Eric:hear it. Well, should we do our deaths first, Because mine is truly. Once you hear it, it is the hailst of Marys.
Matt:Okay, yeah, you know what?
Eric:We'll need a palate cleanser maybe Okay, so we Okay.
Matt:So the first time we did this, I selected for my death somebody who was already old and already ill, and I ended up being correct and correctly predicted the death of Tony Bennett. You were 0 for 2 with George RR Martin and Morgan Freeman. Yeah, you monster. Well, because I think I kind of picked a ringer the first year, I got that feedback from people, so I went with someone who has no business dying, which is Justin Bieber.
Eric:Yeah.
Matt:So I think this year I'm threading the needle. This person is older, yes, but as far as I know is in perfectly okay health, but it's a bummer, eric.
Eric:Who is it?
Matt:Jane Goodall. Ooh, jane Goodall, health, but it's a bummer, eric. Who is it?
Eric:jane goodall, oh jane goodall, 90 years young, monkey and around monkey and around.
Matt:She's got a new like museum or something that's opening up in africa this year and I hope she's here for it and and, honestly, after watching Chimp Crazy, I have only gained that much more respect for her. Yeah.
Eric:She hung out with murder machines.
Matt:She absolutely did, not to mention, just to say, dr Jane Goodall, she's a doctor. Go on Pour the tea. Yeah, she's a doctor. I just want to make sure.
Eric:Wow, matt Shea doesn't think Jane Goodall can be a doctor. He has to Google it. No I just want to make sure she is a doctor. I, I can't, can't, be fucking hanging out around chimpanzee murder machines with a fucking bs well, first of all, she's a dame.
Matt:Yeah, oh yes, she's got a phd from darwin college dr dame jane goodall absolutely, and I want to say this also what I was going to say young Jane Goodall, stone cold.
Eric:Ooh, can't hold on. Let's see, let's see Young Jane Goodall.
Matt:Holy, what a pretty, what a beautiful lady Absolutely and, frankly, looks great for 90. Got to say, dr Jane Goodall, what a beautiful lady Absolutely Inside and out. Gotta say, dr Jane Goodall, what a beautiful lady Absolutely Inside and out. Yeah, absolutely. So anyway, that's my death. Who's yours?
Eric:Every year I feel a little worse, of course, about calling a death. So this year and again stating this all murder is bad, all death, you know, I'd rather no one has to die.
Matt:Yes, yes, Eric.
Eric:Who are you killing? Vladimir Putin, all right, all right, all right. Slava Ukraini, motherfucker Abso-fucking-lutely.
Matt:I love that, eric, I fucking love it. Yeah, yes, I think that that is a prediction. He ain't looking good, well, what I'd say is he could be looking worse. Yeah, all ain't looking good. Well, he could be. What I'd say is he could be looking worse. Yeah, all right, all right, all right, eric, I love your prediction. And now, eric, I am just absolutely chomping at the bit to hear this hail mary here's my hail mary, it better be good, you built it the fuck up.
Eric:Oh it, oh, it's good. My hail mary. For 2025. Matt shea, oh my god, we'll decide. That's the the clear word For 2025, matt Shea, oh my God, will decide. That's the clear word here is decide Uh-huh To get a tattoo.
Matt:Eric, I'm not going to get a tattoo just because you put it on a bingo square, I know, and you don't have to. We got plenty of options. You got your own card to choose.
Eric:Oh, I know I think it is called a hail mary for a reason I think it is a long shot, eric because that's why I said decide.
Matt:I don't think you'll necessarily get one in 2008, but I think by year's end you'll decide well, I talked about this not too long ago that I contemplated getting a carrot tattoo for single carrot theater, my theater company that has since passed away. But I I you know have since lost interest in the idea of getting said tattoo and I don't think I will actually do it. So the idea that I would switch gears and decide to get a different tattoo after taking 33, I suppose, plus years, really to decide to think about getting a tattoo in any kind of seriousness, I don't see it happening. But hey, you know what he's pointing to the stands, eric. I'll tell you what, eric, it's up to you and the listeners, of course, if they put it on their cards, but I will do my best to forget that it is there and come to a genuine decision, and I don't think you should hold your breath for it.
Eric:Who can say?
Matt:Who can say?
Eric:Oh, also, there's a rider to this. There's an unrelated, but a writer PS, because I was discussing these with Alyssa as I was coming up with them. Alyssa wants to know, matt, if you had to get a face piercing, what would you get? And then quote I'm calling it now. 2025 is going to be Matt's bad boy year.
Matt:I end quote I can't. The only way I'd get a face piercing is if somebody literally put a gun to my head.
Eric:If you had, to get, and, matt, it'll. For the rest of your life you'll have this face piercing. So what are you going to get? I don't want it. I know you don't, but you have to.
Matt:I don't want it. I know you don't, but you have to. I don't fucking know.
Eric:I think you could honest to God.
Matt:Maybe an eyebrow piercing, because I could cover it up.
Eric:maybe I think you could pull off a lip piercing.
Matt:Yeah, no, no, thanks, I think you could do it.
Eric:I know you wouldn't want to. I know the idea of that makes your skin crawl, but I think you could. I think this, Matt, I think 2025, this is my soft call it's going to be your bad boy year. We're going to get you in a mosh pit. We're going to get you For $1,000, you will For $1,000,. We're going to get you in a mosh pit. Eric, if you paid me $1,000, I will go those five minutes and then peace out with my check, my guy, or will you linger?
Matt:I doubt it. Will you say, like I found myself. It seems like it might as well be called a cesspit, so I doubt it. All right, fucking germ central up in that bitch. Didn't a fucking global pandemic teach you people anything? Clearly not. You were going there during the turn. Anyway, those are our predictions. Listen, folks, there is a link in this episode description that oh wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Before we end things, eric, we need to discuss the free space, the target.
Eric:The free space. Slash the target space? Yes, it has been.
Matt:Yadaft reaches the top five on good pods, but we have since sort of lost interest in pursuing this goal. I think good pods has lost a lot of steam and I think a lot of podcasters are coming to the same conclusion. Yes, caught on, except with podcasters who weren't really listening on good pods and were just kind of to to to put it in a blue parlance just sort of jerking each other off yeah, yeah and look, they're all people.
Eric:I love jerking off listen, I absolutely.
Matt:I'm happy to jerk off these people going to ham Ham on.
Eric:Zachy D.
Matt:You didn't. No one made you name. Names God, no, god, no. That's not the shout out he wanted, but it's the shout out he got. This man pays our Patreon who?
Eric:literally is out there raising money for children, as I as you speak, uh, anyway, love you zacky d and what? What if?
Matt:what if? What if you needed it? What god I would? I would oh get down anything, anything for you sounds like maracas.
Eric:What?
Matt:are you doing? Oh god, I apologize zach, I apologize to you.
Eric:Nothing I what am I gonna?
Matt:apologize for being a good friend please don't abandon us, please don't abandon us now, oh god um but the free space.
Eric:I have an idea for it. Yeah, what do you got? We reach 100 patrons. 100 patrons, okay, 100 patrons if we're being transparent.
Matt:I think that's a long ways off at the moment. Gotta shoot for the moon. Baby, 100 patients, baby. I love it, I love it, I absolutely love it. So, people, you got to get out there, you got to recruit your friends and listen. I see our download numbers. I know how many of you are not on our Patreon. And that's okay, is it? Because you got a free space waiting for you? So come on down. It's $4 a month. You're not even going to notice it.
Eric:How many people are willing to subscribe?
Matt:just to win bingo? How many a month? You're not even gonna notice it. How many people are willing to subscribe just to win bingo? How many people are we can't? Are we saying 100 overall? Doesn't matter what tier oh yeah, oh god oh, then you got, no fucking excuse. A dollar a month, please a dollar a month, you bastards. That falls out of your pocket on the way to starbucks.
Eric:I piss a dollar every time I walk out of this house.
Matt:I spit a dollar onto the street every time I hock to a hock to a. Yes, Our unfortunately timed neat cast rant. But you know what are you going to do? We didn't know. No, Listen, if you want to submit yourself a bingo card and win the fabulous prize of a mandatory guest spot on this show, yes, Along with I don't know. We have merch now. We have merch now. You know what? We have merch now. We have merch now. What should we send them? As a free sweatshirt.
Eric:Hoodie and a hat.
Matt:Hoodie and a hat Hoodie and a hat Hoodie and a hat. Hoodie and a hat Hoodie hat. Guest spot on the show. If you get a full good bingo, as they say in the bingo community Go to the episode description here, pull up the link it's also in the link tree on our Instagram and everywhere else and submit them. But you must submit them by the end of January. That's been our going cutoff and by the time this episode comes out I cut. Well, we'll give it a couple of days for spoiler purposes and then we will publish our final selections.
Matt:Obviously, we have much more than 25 selections here, so not everything we've discussed will be on our individual bingo cards other than our gets you into and you know death and everything, those we have to include. But uh, other than those, we'll pick our cards. We'll reveal them on our Instagram at. You didn't ask pod and uh, give us your submissions, fill them out. It's a Canva link. It's a drag and drop template. You can just export the JPEG or whatever. Send it in. You didn't ask for this at gmailcom. Send us your shit. I keep track of them throughout the year. I try to mark everybody's off. You should keep track of your own just year. I, I, I, I try to mark everybody's off. You should keep track of your own just to double check me. But uh, yeah, if you want to do it, get in on this do it, nerds I think that'll about do it for this episode of you.
Matt:Didn't ask for this, the first one of 2025, oh, god, let's keep on staying alive, babes keep on staying alive and listenes. Keep on staying alive and listen. You can do so by and this is true listening to this podcast and, in order for us to produce more episodes, I would love to have some questions from you.
Eric:We got questions Call into the thought line, absolutely Like you could. Again cannot stress this enough. You could say pretty much anything in there, and as long as it's not horrific, we'll play it on the show 410-929-5329.
Matt:That's the number for the thought line. Give us a call, we'll listen, we'll play it on the show and you can submit your question to us at youdidntaskforthis on gmailcom. That's all spelled out. Or you didn't ask pod? That's the letter. You didn't ask pod. On Instagram, blue sky threads, facebook, youtube, et cetera, et cetera, and, of course, the discord which you can join at patrioncom slash. You didn't ask for this, eric. Did I miss anything?
Eric:Didn't miss a goddamn thing, baby, then I think it's time to end this episode.
Matt:Oh well, Well, good luck everybody. I always like the bingo episode. It brings me a lot of joy, I like keeping track of it and I hope you do too. So this has been another successful bingo curation. Yes, yes, Well done Matthew, Well done Eric. Oh, so, from all of us here you didn't ask for this my name's Matt Shea.
Eric:My name's Eric Poach.
Matt:And listen. You didn't ask.
Eric:But, bro, check out my shirt right now, okay.
Matt:I see it I see this like metal.
Eric:So the name of this band. Well, first of all, tell me what you think this shirt says.
Matt:Um the.
Eric:Soap Close. It's Thursday, thursday, and I have worn this shirt exactly twice, both of which times were on a Thursday.
Matt:Okay, so you're bringing up a visual cue for our play out.
Eric:Yeah, man Look at that shit.
Matt:I see it, it's like a lightning bolt motif.
Eric:For anyone curious, it's standard black metal font Sure Thursday Thursday Thursday, very good band. They're not a black metal band, which is why this shirt is so funny.
Matt:Oh Well, now the closing joke really hits home.
Eric:Oh yeah, Now they really like it when you explain the joke. That's what I keep telling you in the notes. Explain the joke.
Matt:Explain the joke that they cannot see. Yes, that sounds like a, a, a like a Zen Cohen, Erica you have, you have one central responsibility in this, in this episode to episode.
Eric:And I have technically delivered.
Matt:And that's all we can ask. That's all we can ask Until next Thursday.